It was my high school graduation. My friends spoke enthusiastically about the schools they chose. The campus was amazing, and the clubs sounded fun, and the major was just what they needed. Of course, I said all these things too, but I wondered why I didn’t mean it. Why didn’t I feel the excitement I could see on all their faces? I wasn’t at college yet, but I already felt like I made the wrong decision.
When I was applying to schools during, I didn’t have a “dream school.” Most of my peers knew what they were looking for and which schools seemed like a good fit. I wasn’t even convinced I liked the major I had chosen: business management. Still, I committed to this school and field of study, and I was determined for it to be my perfect fit, so I packed up and moved four hours away from home.Â
My first semester was full of doubt. I struggled to find friends. I tried to talk to people, but I never heard back. I was doing alright in classes, but something still felt off. I had this thought constantly in the back of my head, wondering if I would’ve been better off somewhere else. I felt like maybe if I were closer to home, it wouldn’t be so bad, or if I chose a major where looking at the requirements list didn’t scare me, and instead excited me. I wanted college to feel like I was a step closer to things I dreamt about accomplishing, and I knew I was in the wrong place.Â
Realizing I needed to transfer didn’t stop the constant stress in my head, but only made it worse. I wanted to find my right fit this time, but it had only been about ten months since I applied to school, and my opinions hadn’t changed. Still no dream school or major. I leaned on my family a lot during this, and after talking it out, we decided it was better to really think it out to apply for the fall instead of a rushed application for a random college in the spring. Â
I applied to transfer to UMass Amherst for the fall. It had always been on my radar, but it didn’t stand out enough for me to care. A friend of mine was a student and was telling me how I would love it, so I looked into it. The school seemed like what I needed. Close to home, a pretty campus, and good opportunities. I also thought about my major and landed on communication. It felt like the perfect major for me. I have always wanted to work in the entertainment industry, in any capacity, and reading the course list made me feel like this major is filled with opportunities to learn about that. I finally had that feeling I missed out on in senior year. The feeling of hope and excitement for my future.
Applying and accepting is a big part of transferring, but there was still more in my journey. My first few weeks at UMass felt hard. I’m starting over from the beginning, while everyone I know is already set into their college lives. I’m finding new clubs, new people, and learning a whole new campus. It was scary, but once I got into the flow of it, I felt much more confident. I’m still struggling with the change. I haven’t found my community yet, and I’m still learning the ways of the school, but this time doesn’t feel as bad as last year because this time I have hope that I’m in the right place.
I’m very happy with my choice to transfer to UMass. I know that I’m getting the education I want, and I’m on a great campus, but sometimes I wonder: what if I had stayed at my old school? I miss my friends, and the campus did grow on me, but then I remember I would’ve hated it if I hadn’t tried to transfer. There could have been something better out there for me, and that is enough for me to justify my choice to transfer. I owed it to myself to see what else was out there.
That is my journey as a transfer student thus far. I can’t wait to see what else it teaches me because I know that I am stronger because of it. I also hope that if you are like me, wondering if you are at the right spot, my story has helped you think about what you can accomplish. You will find your way to what is correct for you.Â
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