Dear Teenage Leena,
You spent so much of your life trying to be perfect. Always chasing an invisible standard — saying the right thing, looking the right way, making sure you never messed up. You wanted to get it all right. To be someone. I see you now, your heart full of quiet worry, your mind racing with expectations no one even said out loud. And I want to say: thank you, I forgive you, and I love you.
Thank you for giving it your all in school, for staying up late to meet deadlines just so you could make everyone proud. Thank you for navigating friendships that felt one-sided, for laughing through the pain so no one would worry. For pushing through the days when your effort didn’t match your grades, and for showing up even when everything inside you wanted to hide. You didn’t always speak the loudest, but you always listened, and that quiet strength? It shaped me.
Thank you for taking a chance on yourself and moving across the globe to live your dream. That took more courage than you gave yourself credit for. It might not feel like it right now, but you are already building a life worth living.
I forgive you for all the times you were too hard on yourself. For every quiet “I’m not enough” whispered into the mirror when things didn’t work out. I know you tried so hard to be perfect — thinking if you just did everything right, the rest would fall into place. It’s okay. You were doing your best with what you had. And that’s all that ever mattered.
I forgive you for the people you held onto longer than you should have, for all the moments you stayed silent just to avoid conflict, and for believing your worth depended on being liked by the world. Spoiler Alert : It doesn’t.
I love you for the way you loved — wholeheartedly, without holding back. For believing in happy endings, second chances, and sometimes even believing that the sky was pink, filled with unicorns and rainbows. For getting excited over the little things: a new song on repeat, a spontaneous iced latte run, the way sunshine always seemed to make your day feel just a bit better.
I love how you showed up, for people, for your passions, and for yourself, even when it was scary. You didn’t need to be the loudest in the room to be heard. You were always determined to grow into someone you could be proud of. And you’re doing it.
If I could sit next to you now, I wouldn’t change a thing. I’d smile and remind you that you’re not behind, you’re not too much, and you’re not lost. You’re blooming — imperfectly, beautifully, and exactly on time.
You didn’t need to have it all figured out by 19. No one does. It is just getting started. And every version of you along the way deserves love.
So here’s to you: the girl with big dreams, curious thoughts, and a heart that always led the way. You were never lost — you were becoming you.
Thank you.
I forgive you.
I love you.
Always,
Me
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