PSA: Brock Turner is out of jail after serving only three months of his six month sentence for raping an unconscious girl behind a dumpster at Stanford University.
Quick refresher: Brock Turner was charged with three counts of felony sexual assault in California. Because of his status as a high profile student athlete at Stanford, the judge gave him an exceedingly lenient sentence. After only three months served in jail, Turner is out on the streets again. So, in honor of his release here are just a few things that lasted longer than Turner’s sentence:
Deflate Gate
Tom dragged that out as long as possible.
Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries’ Relationship
11 months of pure publicity, and endless mockery for us, complete with a 72 day marriage.
Lindsay Lohan’s Stint in Rehab in 2007
And obviously she’s been on the straight and narrow ever since….
Donald Trump’s Campaign
Still waiting for the joke to be over.
Our Hangovers from the first Dollar Wells of the year
Okay maybe not actually… but I’m still feeling it at times and I know you will remember that hangover for the rest of the semester.