As a first-year college student, there were a lot of pre-conceived notions I had about college. I heard plenty of stories about what to expect from everyone from my parents and my older sister to aunts, uncles, cousins and older friends. Let me just say that no matter how many people give you advice or tell you what to expect, you will never be completely prepared for the biggest change in your life. I’ve put together a list of the things I’ve learned in my first month here at the University of Iowa.
You will miss home.
You’ll probably come into college expecting to miss home a very minimal amount. For you, that may be true; but for me, I missed home like crazy. I still do. I miss my parents and my bed and not having to shower with shoes on and real food. But that’s okay.
Don’t listen to everyone that say you should only call once a week. And don’t listen to the people who tell you not to go home until Thanksgiving. Call home whenever you want. Go home whenever you want. I’ve definitely found myself experiencing major FOMO since coming to college, and calling home and going home every once in a while definitely helps.
During my first week when I was really missing home, it made me feel even worse to see other people on campus making new friends so easily and having so much fun. But the truth is, they probably miss home, too. It’s probably just as hard for them as it is for you. You just can’t tell because people are really good at hiding their homesickness.
You won’t make best friends right away.
I came to college thinking I was going to meet my best friend for life the day I moved in. My sister’s college roommate is her best friend, and my cousin met her best friend on her floor her freshman year. I thought I would, too, but I haven’t. I was putting so much pressure on myself to find my best friend that when I didn’t, I was too hard on myself. Right now it’s just about meeting people. I have four years to build strong bonds with these people that will hopefully last forever, and it’s important to know that’s not going to happen overnight.
The one cliché piece of college advice that I will condone is to leave your door open. Most of the doors on my floor are almost always open, and that’s how everyone on my floor became so close. When you leave your door open, you’re inviting people to stop in and introduce themselves. It’s a great way not only to meet your neighbors, but also to start making those connections that will last at least through the year.
It’s okay to spend time alone.
That being said about leaving your door open and making friends and such, it’s okay to also spend some time alone. You probably aren’t used to having 24-hour access to people or friends. Being around people constantly might make you feel like you have to always have to be with them, but after a while that can feel overwhelming.
Personally, I’m more of a shy person, so it’s nice to spend some time alone watching movies or reading every once in a while. Take some time at least once a week to hang out with yourself.
It’s also important to do whatever you want in college. Of course there’s going to be a lot of partying and a lot of going out happening all around you. Whether you want to join in or not do whatever you want. Don’t let other people pressure you into going out if you don’t want to. College is the time to make your own decisions and make them for yourself, so don’t let others influence you into doing something you don’t want to. Peer pressure is so high school anyways.
You really do have to study.
If you do want to go out, go for it. But, be sure to leave time for studying and homework, because in college you really do have to study no matter what. In high school, I didn’t really do a whole lot of studying. Study guides from the teachers and review games in class the day before a test were all I needed to get an A. In college, professors don’t give you study guides or play review games in class before a big test. You’re on your own.
If you did poorly on a test in high school, it was easy to pull yourself back up because there were probably a few tests in each class to help equal out your test grade. In college, your classes probably only have two tests: a midterm and a final, and they are worth a hefty chunk of your grade. If you do really well on all of your assignments, but completely flop on both of your tests, your grade isn’t going to look so hot. Study, study, study!
Study a little every night in the week or two leading up to a test. Make flashcards. Have a study session with people from your class. Go to office hours. Not only can going to office hours help you learn the material better, but it also helps your professor learn your name. Going to office hours also shows your professor how invested you are in the class, and that can only be beneficial to you and your grade in the long run. Not to mention that if a professor knows your name, he is way more willing to write you a letter of recommendation later on.
While studying is very important, so is your sanity. If you need a night off from studying and homework just to watch Netflix and let your brain rest, take the night off. It’s not worth it to strain your brain, and the work you would get done probably wouldn’t be your best anyway.
Wear whatever you want to class.
Before coming to college, I heard (pretty much all my life) that nobody dresses up for class, especially if that class is at 8 a.m.. That is probably true for some people, maybe even most people. But who cares what everybody else does or says or thinks. Wear whatever the heck you want to class. Honestly, nobody cares and if they do it’s because they wish they had dressed like you, whether you dressed up and they didn’t or they dressed up and you didn’t.
No matter what you wear, it will never feel right in terms of what other people think. There are days when I dress up, and it feels like everybody else is in sweats. And there are days when I wear sweats, and it feels like everybody else is dressed up. Honestly, who cares? Wear whatever your little heart desires.
When it comes to college advice, don’t listen to anyone.
I know I just rambled on about what you should do in college, but honestly, I don’t care what you do in college. These are things that I have learned. I’m not trying to tell you what to do; I just wanted to let you know things that I’ve experienced in learned in my first month on campus that I thought might help you. After a month in college, your list might look completely different, and that’s okay! That’s what college is all about: discovering you, and that includes finding out what works for you.