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Wellness > Sex + Relationships

Pros and Cons of Dating in a Small Town

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Iowa chapter.

If you didn’t grow up in a small town, it’s hard to explain what it is like to live there. Tiny towns are heavily influenced by the emotions and the people that surround the five-mile width of them. This makes things slightly more complicated, especially when it comes to dating in a small town. And while it may be hard to understand if you live in a big city, here are some pros and cons that paint the picture of what it’s like.

Pros

1. Very Short Distance

One of the most reasonable perks that come from small town dating is the fact that at most, your significant other may be twenty minutes away. There’s not much to worry about when you’re in very close driving distance from each other. Better yet, almost all towns contain some form of school, whether a high school, community college or large university, the odds are that you may even be in the same school as the one you have your eye on.

2. The ‘Getting to Know You’ Stage

One of the most annoying stages, in my opinion, is learning the basics before moving on with the possible relationship. When a town is small enough that everyone knows everyone, it’s not hard to learn all of the good that they’ve done and possibly all of the bad, as well as the type of person they are. Why waste time going out with someone for a few weeks to learn that they aren’t who you thought they were when you can do that by walking across the street to the local coffee shop and asking?

3. Everyone Knows

What’s better than being in a community where the majority of the people are on the same page as you? When an entire town tends to all have the same information, it’s hard to find problems when there’s none that are caused.

Cons

1. Everyone Knows…Still 

While this can be a major positive, there are also a few downsides. Drama can come up much quicker when the whole town is in the loop, especially in the sense that maybe some individuals don’t necessarily approve. Depending on the size of the town, it’s hard to not hear the news that you care to know, including the entire list of past relationships for pretty much every individual that you know. This makes it incredibly easy to start problems, making it one of the worst (while still sometimes one of the best) things about dating in a small town.

2. New Prospects

It may be difficult finding someone to form a relationship with when everyone knows everyone so well. Even harder when everyone has dated everyone, making the chance of tension much more likely passing individuals on the street.

3. Reputation

One wrong relationship and it may affect you for years (or until you leave that place). It’s hard to make a better name for yourself when that one incident three years ago is still brought up at brunch every other weekend. This makes it hard to date anyone new, most likely because the whole town has heard all the stories, all the breakups and every detail in between. This doesn’t make anything easy in any situation, let alone one involved with forming a serious relationship.

Dating in a small town definitely has its pros and cons, but that doesn’t make it much different than any other place in the world. Slight differences are to be expected because nothing is ever the exact same, but that shouldn’t stop you from going for something that you want, whether that be a job, an award or even a boy.

Image Credit: 1, 2, 3

Sydney is currently a Freshman at the University of Iowa, double-majoring in Journalism and Psychology.