Greek life is big here at Iowa, and since the campus has twenty two Interfraternity Council frats, whether you are a member of Greek life or not, you’re sure to have run into a frat boy at some point in your college experience. I’m not saying that every frat guy fits the standard bill, and I highly applaud the men that exceed these low expectations. They give a good name to Greek life, which is usually deserved. More and more lately, it’s these guys that are making an appearance in the Greek community, those that are ambitious, caring, smart and truly fun to be around. As a female college student, and a member of a sorority myself, I am incredibly thankful that this is becoming that new fraternity standard, and these men are making fantastic strides in changing the culture of Greek life, as well as serving as terrific members of society. So, when I say frat guys, these men aren’t who I am referring to. Though thankfully, the frat boys of Iowa are decreasing, I’m sure all the women reading this have encountered their fair share. So, this article goes out to all the frat guys and all of us ladies that have to put up with them.
1. When they name drop their frat every five seconds.
Tell me again how talking up your brothers makes you any cuter.
2. When they “accidentally” brush you and then toss a wink into their apology.
As if I secretly really loved the subtle butt squeeze you just dished out, dang frat guy, you see right through me.
3. When their best form of flirting is asking you to be on their team for beer pong.
Is that really the most interesting conversation starter you can think of?
4. The stories about how dangerous and cool they are… “Yeah, well, last weekend, I rode out of the bar at like three a.m. on my longboard, and no cops even questioned it, so yeah I guess you could say it was pretty cool.”
Buckle up, its gonna be a long ride. Frat guy is always really excited to tell you about how he’s clearly the toughest in the frat. If you don’t believe him, his bro in the corner is all too enthusiastic to chime in and agree in the hopes that you’ll ditch his friend for the nice guy.
5. But then after two drinks, the coolness is gone, and they are lowkey (highkey) desperately rambling about their entire life and all their failed attempts at love.
Suddenly, you are uncomfortable, and frat guy seems very close to being in love with you, and you wonder how the conversation has progressed to this point.
6. When he’s trying really hard to flirt, so you seek the bathroom as sanctuary… but unfortunately he catches on.
Leave me in peace, sir, I just want to find my friends. I’m here for them, not you.
7. When their outfits are preppier than yours.
Vineyard Vines, this one’s at you.
8. When they hit on the entire squad.
I know it increases your chances that one of us might be interested, but a blanket pick up line isn’t your best move, frat guy.
Sometimes frat guys just don’t get it, but squad always does. Stick to your ladies. May you always meet the nice frat boys, and may your nights always be lit.