So, you have a habit you wish you didn’t, and you want to break it? Welcome to the club! Be that nail biting, overeating or procrastination, habits are just that, they are habitual and hard to break. Everyone has habits they wish they didn’t have, but that doesn’t mean that they are impossible to change. Just inhibiting to start. So, let’s make it easier and do this together. How do you change a habit? You do just that, by changing. This may not be easy, but it can help make permanent change if you put your heart in it. Here are the top five ways to change a habit.
1. Patience
First and foremost, remember patience pays. So, you want to change something you have a habit doing? Well, no matter how badly you want to change, one constant remains the same. Just like the habit that you have has taken time to develop, so is getting rid of of that specific habit. It takes twenty-one days to create a habit, and even then, it is up to the individual to maintain those changes, so the best advice I can give, is to start with a patient mindset. Changing your habit will take continuous training to shift those behaviors, and this has to take time if it is to be done properly. It is only natural to go through trial periods, transitional periods, adjustments and failures, and of course being ready to replace this habit for a positive one. You will be far more successful if you are prepared to wait and try again, than expecting results overnight. Remember, patience pays in the long run!
2. With patience in mind, remember to forgive failures.
As discussed, it takes a long time to break and change habits, just like it takes a long time to adopt them. However, making changes to habits will only take longer if you give up completely at the first sign of failure. Failure is inevitable because imperfection is as inevitable as being human itself. If you expect to change a habit by being perfect in developing your new one, you’re going to have a rude awakening. Failure will reward you with success, because it helps you learn instead of bypassing this stage and repeating previous actions that led you to the habit. So remember, forgive your failures. Changing the habit is already hard enough as it is, be kind to yourself through the process, and you’ll be more successful in the long run.
3. Remember structure.
Another great way to succeed in developing a new habit or changing an old one is to provide yourself with some structure. Humans are habitual creatures by nature, so whether we consider ourselves free spirits or not, we all follow our own natural schedules and habits every day. If you give yourself structure when something unexpected happens (and it will), you will be better prepared to combat the problem than if you are going in completely unprepared. Structure is like the backup plan to the main plan, and it can only help provide you with the safety of knowing that there is more than one way you can change your habits, and not get lost in the process.
4. Remember driving decisions.
So, now that you have structure in place and you have forgiveness at the ready for when failures inevitably make the road bumpy, now it’s time to remind yourself why you are doing all of this in the first place. Maybe you are trying to be less shy, so you plan to approach someone new every week… before, ask yourself why you are doing this? What is driving this new behavior? If being less shy is your goal, then are you currently feeling isolated or lonely? Let that connection be your drive, so when it gets hard to make that decision to change, you are motivated by your reasons. Having motivations and a clear reason for the deep-rooted reasons for your habits will help you make decisions to stay on track when it gets difficult. So, remember to be driven by your decisions, and you’ll remain consistent and actually reach all of your goals!
5. Remember to rework wrongdoings.
Another great tip for new habits or changing habits is to always rework wrongdoings. It is one thing to try to forgive mistakes, and another not to dwell in your wrongdoings and get stuck in a rut of guilt and regret. Even if you are able to look past your failures and keep going to make new changes, you may need to still work on your mindset, so no permanent damage ruins your results. Reworking wrongdoings and challenging yourself to see your mistakes as opportunities for growth will help you actually stick with the changes and get to your goals. Say you are trying to be less of a procrastinator, but you don’t give yourself more than two days for a paper when your plan was to work a week ahead of an assignment. Don’t beat yourself up, rework your wrongdoings. Did you have a lot going on this week, did you put it off for easier assignments or was something else in place? Figure this out and you will be able to overcome any obstacle and will be able to change your habits for good.
Next time you want to change a habit, remember patience, forgiving failures, structure, drive or purpose and reworking wrongdoings. No one is perfect, but if you remain consistent, driven and compassionate you will not only take on changing habits, but take on just about anything. World domination, anyone? I feel that coming next, so let’s do this, because anything is possible!