Let it be known that I have been here at the University of Iowa for over two years now. Granted, I am not an expert . . . but I certainly do know a thing or two about life as a Hawkeye. And for the most part this place has served as my home away from home, but it’s not without its drawbacks. In fact, I am going to name a few in this article. So hang on to your corn, people . . . a storm’s a brewing.
***Please take note that these views are exaggerated for cynical effect. Enjoy.
1. Nobody Knows You . . . NOBODY
Coming from a small school where your life is chronicled in every newspaper publication, this concept definitely threw me for a loop. I love knowing people because knowing people leads to conversation and conversation leads to the formation of all sorts of relationships. Thus, it’s certainly daunting to know that every. single. encounter. you have for quite some time will be built from the ground up.
2. Professors Are Like Unicorns . . . Rare And Hard To Find
Professors are most certainly a different species. At a big university you are forced to accept the fact that you are simply a number, a recognizable face, and possibly a name to go with that. Just do well in the class and move on. But once (or if) you actually find someone who you really enjoy, well . . . it’s like climbing freaking Mount Everest to attain any kind of friendly status with them. Am I being annoying? Do they even care? How many office hours have I been to!?
3. Two Words: GROUP PROJECT
Sure, everyone let you down in high school and they’ll be mentioned alphabetically in your memoir, but let’s turn that up 2,000,000 watts to the college level. Not only do you probably have no idea who you’re working with–it gets awkward to ask again once you immediately forget–but lack of commitment and no ambition seem to be a hobby for some folks here on campus. No, really, it’s fine. I’ll just go ahead and do this by myself.
4. Love Is Hopeless
That’s right. No real love will be found here on a campus with 30,000 individuals. But at least we have those brief eye flirtations with beautiful people on our way to class . . . who we will never, ever see again but continue to think about for the next week.
5. Don’t Walk, RUN!
10 minutes between classes may seem like a lifetime in high school–or at a private institution–but here at the University of Iowa you better be sprinting up that hill. Knees to chest, knees to chest! With a bigger campus, it’s definitely not unreasonable for a student to have to book it from the EPB to Van Allen, all without being hit by the cars they are dodging to make it on time.
So, my fellow Hawkeyes, let me leave you with this: continue to fight the good fight and soon enough we will all encounter even more struggles, but with a diploma in hand.
Photos: Cover, GIF #1, GIF #2, GIF #3, GIF #4, GIF #5, GIF #6