Though it’s still technically fall, the cold weather and dry air have settled onto campus, and we curly girls are not feelin’ it. We all know the usual struggles: frizz, tangles, trying to…(ugh) style it. But now we’ve moved from summer territory and the dangers of humidity to an evenly matched foe—winter. Let Mia tell it to you straight (ha, get it?)
1. The limp, no-curl
It doesn’t do that awesome springy curl thing that it did that one day in early September. It just kind of hangs there. Not curling. A hat was not in my outfit plan today (!!!).
2. The ever-present frizz
So summer’s over, but you’re still here? I didn’t give you enough air-dry time before I had to catch the bus, so this is what you do to me? Really? I look like a maltese with a bad case of static electricity.
3. Tangles/Snarls/Knots
I can’t catch a break, can I? I used three bottles of conditioner and all of my Moroccan oil and you know I can’t brush you (please see #2).
4. When you try to convince yourself you’re not a hat person to try and save your hair
Hats were apparently made for shiny, straight-haired girls who wake up in the morning radiating Beyoncé and smelling like Selena Gomez (she seems like she would smell nice, no?). We try the baseball cap, the beanie, the snapback, the…beret? It either ruins our perfectly sculpted mane by flattening or denting, and it’s all downhill from there until the hair tie comes out.
5. Speaking of hair ties…
Hey, big rich companies pumping these babies out like hotcakes: make them better. Less snap-able. You’re killin’ us out here. Whether our beastly manes are getting stronger, or the hair ties are getting flimsier, we need something along the lines of bungee cord. That is all, thanks.
6. Cream, gel, mousse, spray, serum, oil, or…tears?
Just because I’m a mousse person in the summer doesn’t mean I am year-round. My hair’s needs might change just like the seasons and I can go from needing a sweet-smelling mousse to a super-hold gel in a matter of days. It’s hard to keep up with…if you know anyone with curly hair, you know we have an arsenal of product sitting on our desks waiting for orders to attack.
7. Okay, when I say the word, just do it: GROW
If only it were that easy. You know how many times my naturally straight-haired friend tells me she needs a haircut? Like once a week. I have to physically stop myself from knocking on my hairdresser’s door because I want my hair to look like it grew maybe an inch from January to December.
8. But the dead ends…
So, yeah, haircuts are necessary. Because then you have those not-curly dead ends that throw off your whole curl vibe. You could be rocking the corkscrews all the way down until those pesky little ends make you look stringy and limp (eww).
9. So, do I have a part?
You know those girls that can flip their hair left, right, back, and upside down and it still looks cute? I don’t think so. I have to schedule a meeting with my hair, sit down with it at a nice dinner, sweet talk it a little, and then maybe it will cooperate on a side that I can part it on. And then that’s it. Parted for life. Or like six months. Same thing, really.
10. That “I’m going to get stuck in this one position and never move” thing
Naps if you’re going somewhere later: Off-limits. Ponytails: The highest form of commitment. Hats: No going back. Curls are merciless and stubborn. They do what they want, and they stay where they are, but only when you don’t want them to. Try to do the princess “pull out the bun and watch the waves cascade along my shoulders” move, you can’t. Not gonna happen. That hair is staying vertical and that’s the fate you chose.
11. Styling, Straightening
It’s an affair, a love-hate relationship, really. On one hand, you love the way you look with straight hair; it’s like you have a secret twin that you can whip out whenever you want who’s probably cooler and less socially awkward than you are. On the other, you feel a little guilty crisping all the life out of your luscious curls who only want to love you. But sometimes you just gotta do it. And yes, you will wear it for the next two days straight, because it took so much effort to perfect. That’s what dry shampoo is for, duh.
12. Don’t wash everyday! It’s okay, trust me.
It can actually super dry out your scalp and deprive it of essential nutrients to be its beauteous self. Conditioner: Best Friend. Shampoo: That guy you see at the gym every other day or so.
13. Air dry or towel dry?
They say towel drying creates frizz. So you dry it a little, then let it air-dry. You put in product, you must then leave to dry on its own for its designated time. I’m more of a half-hour to an hour girl, but this can take much longer, or shorter. Naturally this doesn’t coincide with your other morning rituals, ever. Especially at school. So of course, by the time you make it to class at 9:30am, it’s already a loss. *Sigh*
14. Things constantly getting caught in it
Why? Why the swarm of ladybugs? (True story, ha ha..) Leaves, dust, food particles, paper scraps, clothes fuzz, small children, etc. It’s like there’s some secret sign saying: hard to get out of, soft nesting place! Residencies Available!
15. Invading the Personal Space of Others
Remember that sweaty concert when you were packed like sardines, couldn’t breathe, having the best time of your life? That cute guy wanted to dance with you, he really did, but that thing on your head, that crazy mane that you tried to calm down before you left your dorm, it was just too much. He was choking on it, breathing it in, it was getting into his eyes. It can happen anywhere, really. And usually does. You can’t help it, but you still feel bad when someone pulls one of your curls out of their mouth because they sat too close to you on the bus (oops).
Speaking of curls, check out the awesome comic Cheyan Lefebre wrote for the “Style” section of TODAY.com on Pinterest, and if it isn’t the most relatable thing you’ve read in a while, well, do you even have curly hair?