This past summer, I had the opportunity to live and study abroad in London, England. Leading up to my departure, I felt a wide and complex range of emotions: excited, nervous, intimidated, eager, and perhaps more shockingly, relief. Over the previous several months, before leaving for my study abroad program, the U.S. has been in a tumultuous political state. No matter one’s thoughts or feelings on the current situation in America or the Trump administration, it is undeniable that political division has put a significant, and at times oppressive, strain on society.
While I always dreamed of studying abroad during my undergraduate studies, part of me felt the timing of my program could not come at a better time. A summer in London felt like a breath of fresh air to me, free of the daily bombardment of chaos and political dilemmas I experienced as an American in recent times. My personal interest in politics and governance, and political science studies at university, contribute to this. On any given day in my everyday life, I discuss or think about current affairs: in the classroom, in my home, with my friends and family, etc.
I, like I would imagine many others, feel a creeping sense of tiredness. A topic that I once found stimulating and inexhaustible had, by the time I left for London in early June, evoked stress rather than enjoyment, and weariness rather than vigor. My three months abroad felt like a light at the end of the tunnel, a three-month respite from an indefinite future of political uncertainty in my country. With that said, politics and governance will never be something I can disengage with or ignore, out of both my sense of responsibility to be an informed and participatory citizen, and due to my personal convictions and future ambitions.
Before I even boarded the plane to London, I began to realize this was, to put it bluntly, a fool’s dream. When submitting my leave of absence at my summer job, my boss immediately questioned my choice to study in London. “Why London?” he asked me from across the lunch counter. “Why not?” I responded curiously. “England isn’t what it used to be. Not safe there anymore.” I asked him if you had ever been there himself. He hadn’t. I then asked why he felt it was unsafe. He didn’t have a clear answer for me, or at least one that he felt confident to share with me in the workplace.
My mother likewise expressed concerns over my plans to study abroad. In the face of recent, and arguably tense, changes in US foreign and trade policy, she feared rising anti-American sentiment would at times make my experience as an American living abroad difficult at times. The protests across Europe, however, primarily in Spain, against tourism fed into these fears. I had never considered that my nationality might impact how I was treated while abroad, and my experience more generally. My Americanness was something I couldn’t hide even if I wanted to: my accent, style, perhaps even the way I hold myself are distinguishably “American.” Already, the implications of American and global politics were influencing my study abroad experience.
In my first few weeks in London, it became clear that my dream of escaping the chaos of American politics was in some ways achievable, and in other ways impossible. My daily routine transformed while living abroad; everything was new to me, and it took nearly all my time and energy to embrace it and explore all the opportunities presented to me. I was studying, working, traveling, meeting new people, trying new foods, and learning how to take care of myself and an apartment all on my own.
Due to this, I quickly fell behind on recent developments back home in the U.S. I hadn’t even realized I was out of the loop until my mom mentioned protests and riots that were ongoing in Los Angeles at the time. “What riots?” I asked concerningly. My mom was shocked, and I was shocked. How could I have not heard about the ICE raids occurring across multiple cities in my home country?
It was in this moment that I discovered this disappointment in myself felt worse than the tiredness I experienced before leaving. I was disappointed in my ignorance, not only as a political science student but as a person who prides herself on her commitment to being a politically informed and conscientious person. Neither my busy schedule nor the fact that I was temporarily living abroad did not and could justify “unplugging” from the political conversation in my country.
Furthermore, my ability to disconnect for a few weeks reminded me of my privilege. People who look like me and hold the same capital and/or social power as me have the luxury to not engage with current affairs in the ways that other people cannot. This experience was an important lesson that, instead of abusing this privilege, I have the power and duty to acknowledge it and accomplish something productive with it.
This privilege was reaffirmed through the way I was treated as an American living in London. Generally, I never felt judged or treated differently because of my nationality. While occasionally my friends and I may have been the end of a joke about American accents or mannerisms, there was nothing said or done to us that was truly offensive. Yet again, I recognize the fact that my physical traits likely influenced this reality. Would I have been afforded the same grace if I looked different or spoke with a distinct accent?
A few times, particularly while at my internship, I would receive questions about the political ongoings in the United States, as if I were a representation of what Americans really think about what has been transpiring. Most times, these questions were asked in good faith and genuine curiosity rather than accusatory or leading. I always answered respectfully and in line with my personal beliefs, disclaiming that not everyone holds the same view. I was proud of myself for being articulate during these few interactions and remaining steadfast to my convictions, while still prefacing that my opinions alone shouldn’t be used to generalize those of the American public.
All in all, my experience as an American studying abroad was eye-opening. My passion for politics and governance was reignited, and I was reminded of my privilege. I derive great pride from being educated so that I can confidently articulate my opinions when asked, no matter by whom or in what setting. Upon returning, I have kept this lesson close to my heart and moved forward with greater appreciation for my potential.