Before coming to UConn, I had been warned that I would feel homesick at some point. Being 3,000 miles away from home as an exchange student from Ireland for almost four months straight, it was something that I was bound to feel. A few months before leaving for UConn, my home university gave us a presentation on the challenges one may face when going abroad. At the time, I did not pay too much attention to it. I figured I would deal with a few challenges but overall, I would be fine. As August approached and it was time to pack up my life for the fall semester, I began feeling apprehensive about leaving home for the first time. During my freshmen and sophomore year, I lived with my parents, as many other Irish students do. Even though I was extremely excited about studying abroad and gaining more independence, I worried I would struggle. When the pandemic began, I started to embrace my hometown and its sense of community a lot more. The thought of leaving my small seaside town to move across the Atlantic Ocean to an unfamiliar town that is pretty much in the middle of nowhere was overwhelming, to say the least. However, I knew that coming to UConn was something I needed to do. I had always wanted to study abroad. Getting accepted to go study at a top U.S. university was a dream come true.
I truly believed that homesickness would hit me straight away. Flashbacks of the struggles I faced at the beginning of freshman year had me nervous. It took me a while to adapt to college life in Ireland, and I feared the same would happen when I arrived in Storrs, Connecticut. Thankfully, my assumptions were wrong. The first few weeks at UConn were some of the best times I had ever had. I settled in quickly, made lots of new friends, and had no desire whatsoever to return home any time soon. I was finally experiencing college properly again after doing Zoom U for a year and a half. As the weeks went by, I was shocked that I still had not felt homesick. I celebrated my 21st birthday in mid-October and I had never been happier. Leading up to it, I had thought that celebrating my first birthday away from home would be hard. Luckily, I was surrounded by so many great people here that I never felt that way.
That wave of happiness soon came crashing down; not in an extreme way, but enough to make me realize that I was no longer on such a high. It had to happen at some point, but I had been doing so well that I actually thought I might go home for winter break and never have had the desire to want to go home early. Even during “family weekend”, I did not get many feelings of homesickness despite seeing so many other students showing their families their campus and walking their dogs by the lake. However, it all hit me during a very stressful week in late October. It was filled with exams, assignments, and self-induced stress. Instead of being productive and managing my stress levels, I broke down. I realized that I was missing home when talking on the phone with one of my friends from there. Even though I had constantly been in touch with people back home, talking over the phone just isn’t the same as being in their physical presence. Sometimes you just want a hug from them, to sit down and have dinner, or to go for a walk together.
The reality is, I will have to wait until I go home for winter break for that, and that is okay. While the homesickness finally hit me, it does not mean that I want to run back home (not that I can anyway). I love being at UConn, even during the rough times. Homesickness is a normal part of going away for college. While some are fortunate that home is only a car ride away, that is not the case for everyone. Luckily, I am surrounded by plenty of other people who are all in the same situation and have felt those feelings of sadness and loneliness at some point this semester. There is no shame in missing your loved ones back home while away at college.
With all that being said, here are some of the things that helped me while I was dealing with homesickness:
Call family and friends more
During stressful days, there is nothing better than talking to someone who is removed from the situation and can help put you more at ease. Calling home should be something we do more often rather than avoid.
Talk to friends who are in the same situation as you
It may seem like many of those around you are constantly going home on the weekends or may have the option to do so. However, there will always be others who live too far away for that. Talking to others who are in the same boat can make you feel less lonely.
Take time for yourself
I found that my homesickness was induced by stress because college work can get the best of you at times. Therefore, it is important to carve out time for yourself. Whether it is going to the gym, reading a book, or watching Netflix with some ice cream on standby, prioritizing yourself will help put you in a better place mentally.
Make plans
This can be for either when you get home or while you are still at college. Making plans is always a good idea. Having something to look forward to can help dull the sadness you may feel about being unable to return home sooner than you would like.