I am halfway through college.
Wow. It’s insane to see it written down. It solidifies it, in a way: it’s no longer just a fleeting realization that makes my heart drop. It’s now a real, recorded fact.
When I think about 2027, my graduation year, creeping closer and closer, I feel nauseous — and I honestly couldn’t tell you if that is out of excitement or fear. I’m sure that most of us rising juniors are feeling this way as true adulthood nears. How is it that I turn 20 at the end of the year? What do you mean I’m not 16 anymore?
I’ve learned a lot in my four semesters at the University of Connecticut, both in my classes and in life. I feel like I’ve changed so much from who I was walking across the graduation stage as a 2023 high school senior to who I am now, getting ready to pack up my sophomore dorm. Honestly, I feel like a completely different person than I was just a year ago, finishing up my freshman year. College ages you, that’s for sure.
Here are some of the most important lessons I learned so far at UConn.
People Come And Go: Let them
Everyone comes into college hoping for a big friend group, where you all go get dinner together, play Spikeball on the lawn, laugh in your dorm, or go to parties with. You’ll be inseparable while you’re in school and each other’s bridesmaids after graduation.
If this happens, great! I’m so happy for you. The reality is, though, it probably won’t. Not immediately, at least.
I felt like it was so easy to make friends in high school. I always had someone to eat lunch with or hang out with outside of class. Here, I found friendships to be a little more difficult.
I thought I was the problem. Am I too shy? Do I have too high expectations for people?
I soon realized that there doesn’t have to be a whole problem for a friendship not to work out. There’s nothing wrong with me, or you, or anyone else. Some people just come and go. Not everyone is meant to be part of your story forever; sometimes, they are just a chapter, or even just a few pages.
If you find your life to be more peaceful without a person, let them go! Just because they were your first friend doesn’t mean they will be your last. With all the stress of the college workload, the last thing you need is drama in your life. Protect your peace!
Apply: The worst thing they can say is no
Even if you think it’s a long shot, apply for that scholarship, job, e-board position, or internship. The worst thing they can say is “no” — but what if it’s a “yes”? You’ll never know if you don’t apply.
Leave that anxiety and fear of rejection at the door. You’re going to be rejected at some point, and you should learn how to cope with it now. Do you remember that poster in your elementary school classroom? “FAIL: First Attempt In Learning!”
Yeah, that applies here too. Learning how to be a good applicant or interviewee only happens with practice, and the chance to practice only comes when you apply. Put yourself out there!
I know it’s hard. I have rejection anxiety, too. You’re allowed to be sad and frustrated. I’ve had my fair share of rejection tears. Just remember that it’s all part of the process. Let yourself cry and be mad, but then pick yourself up. You are more than your failures or rejections. Your time will come, I promise.
YOLO
Or, YOCO: You’re only in college once. Join that club! Go to that party! Pull an all-nighter to watch TikTok! Take that class that has nothing to do with your major but seems really cool!
This is the best — and maybe the only — time for you to explore your interests outside of your major. So do it! Take that floral art class. I know you want to.
Also, don’t just hole yourself up in the library or in your dorm all day, every day. Yes, you’re in college to get a degree, but I think the college experience is equally important. Sometimes, a little pre-exam scrambling is worth the fun night out with your friends that you would’ve otherwise missed out on.
My two years as a Husky have taught me so much more than just these points, but I think these were the hardest for me to learn. It’s hard to recognize when you need to let someone walk out of your life, to get over fears of rejection, and to realize that your studies aren’t everything. However, I think that all three are valuable lessons that everyone learns — or should learn — at some point in their college career.
I still have four more semesters at UConn, and I’m sure I still have much more learning to do about myself and the people around me. I keep trying to find ways to slow time down, but I think I’ve realized I just have to ride the wave instead of fighting it.
Rising juniors, let’s take a deep breath. Even if it doesn’t seem like it, we still have time. We have to finish college strong!