Recently rumors have sparked that Billie Eilish, 20, and Jesse Rutherford, 31, of The Neighborhood are dating. These were spurred by paparazzi photos taken of Billie Eilish and Jesse Rutherford at a dinner together, close and cuddly. While people, including myself, originally found these rumors uncomfortable due to the age gap, it became something completely different when pictures were released of Jesse Rutherford and Billie Eilish hanging out together when she was 15. Whether or not these rumors are true, they brought to mind a rampant issue in the music industry: grooming.
The music industry’s long standing history of grooming
Throughout the decades there have been countless instances of grooming that have been swept under the rug. For instance, Beyonce and Jay Z got into a relationship when she was 19 and he was 31 after meeting when she was 18. There is also Joey Armstrong of SWMRS who was 22 when dating 16-year-old Lydia Night of The Regrettes. Lastly, and the most infamous, is R. Kelly, 27, who married Aaliyah when she was 15. It’s important to note that grooming does happen to male artists as well but at a much smaller rate than women. For example: Harry Styles, 17, was with Caroline Flack, 31. But why does this seem to be a reoccurring theme in the music industry throughout the decades?
Why is grooming so common in the music industry?
First of all, there’s an obvious power imbalance at work in all of these situations. There are many teenagers who are trying to break into the music industry or find their way to deal with fame if they have. Therefore, these older predatory men who have a longstanding presence in the music industry are able to swoop in and appear to be “helping” these teenage artists. Therefore, these young artists feel that to gain a bigger standing in the music industry they must do what these more powerful artists ask since they only want to help. Thus, this leads to an environment ripe for grooming.
In addition, there is the factor of a lack of parental supervision taking place. These young artists are traveling and touring the world while many times their parents have jobs or/and other children to attend to back home. Though some of these children have body guards (as many fellow big artists do) their supervision only goes so far, handling mostly fans and paparazzi who are seen as threats to artists. Thus this leaves these teenagers going to places they have never been before without true supervision and having to be for the most part taking care of themselves for the first time. This once again leaves theses young adults and teenagers in a very vulnerable state where they become the perfect targets for predators. However, that is not to say that this is the parents or child’s fault as I stated above, they believe this is a person who can heighten their career and be a mentor.
Now this grooming scenario is obviously common as we have seen multiple people we know and love in the music industry deal with it. So why is it not talked about as much as it should be?
Why Has there been silence about the grooming in the music industry?
The main reason why grooming and its lasting presence in the music industry is not talked about is that it is purposely swept under the rug by PR teams and paparazzi. For instance, many PR teams will keep artist’s inappropriate relations away from tabloids with money and the artists high standing in the industry. A prime example of this is seen with R. Kelly’s countless relations with children never making headlines until his victims spoke out against his “advice” and pressure by his PR and legal teams. In addition, it is very easy for paparazzi to spin the relations as the child’s fault and as a “risky romance”. For instance harry Styles was promoted as a womanizer for years after being seen with Caroline Flack. This perception of it being a consensual relationship pursued by the victim leads to the actual problematic nature of the relationship being overlooked and silencing the victim.
It is also important to note that PR teams create a toxic fan culture that also feeds into this blissful ignorance of grooming. When fans love an artist and their PR teams work to have only the best parts of the artist shown it can be hard to view them as a person. In fans’ eyes these artists can do no wrong and are like a god- never having any faults. They are idolized, put on this pedestal they can never come down from. Without meaning too, this means that it becomes easy for fans to then not call out problematic behavior of a “fave” of theirs even when it becomes apparent in photos, leading to the perpetuation of hiding grooming in the music industry.
What can we do about it?
Therefore, it is important to realize grooming is a reoccurring issue in the music industry and has been for decades. When we see evident grooming, we need to try to go against the toxic fan culture, calling out artists for inappropriate behavior rather than back them up. If we do this we can make a difference for victims in the music industry and recognize this rampant issue. For example, many people love The Neighborhood but if Jesse Rutherford is dating Billie Eilish after evidence shows they knew each other when Billie Eilish was a minor, then we need to call out the clear problems with that. If we do this then we can start working towards a safer space for these children entering the music industry, decreasing the number of victims.