Sex can be, and should be enjoyable and fun. But, sex can be confusing and the lines of what it should
be like are blurred. With sex information becoming so accessible on the internet and through word of mouth, it can
be a blessing and a curse. We are often taught through peers and the internet about what sex should be like,
what you are doing “right,” and what you are doing “wrong.” The internet as some interesting opinions on what your sex
life should be like, however, there are many myths.
Here are 5 myths we need to stop believing about sex.
- Painful sex is normal.
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Pain during sex, especially during penetration is not normal, not healthy. There shouldn’t be any sharp
pain or burning during sex. If you’re in pain, it could mean you’re not producing enough natural
lubricant and that there is a lot of friction. Friction can cause tearing and vaginal infections. If sex
is painful stop and don’t go forward, tell your partner. Invest in lubricants, spend more time on
foreplay, or even try changing sex positions.
- Porn is an accurate representation.
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Ummm, no. Pornography is not an accurate representation how sex should be. It can be degrading to
women, forcing them into situations they may not like and using language not every women finds
sexy. Porn is often overly dramatized; not everyone screams that loud during sex, and not everybody
looks like that. You should not feel pressured or intimidated by porn, and you do not need to “act” to please
your partner. Also, some positions and activities depicted can be dangerous to your body. Do what feels right,
and only do what you feel comfortable with. Be yourself and enjoy the experience without expectations or comparison!
- You always have to be “in the mood.”
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Many women may be terrified to not be sexually available to their partner at all times. You are not a sex machine, you are not only there to please your partner only and you don’t owe
anyone, anything. Sex is a two way street, and you should want to engage in sex with your
partner too. Sex should not be chore and not should only be pleasurable for one party involved.
It’s much more enjoyable when both parties are actively engaged and excited!
- Initiation is a man’s job.
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Women are told to not bring up when they want to have sex or when they are sexually aroused
because it’s a “mans job.” Women who are open about their sexual desires and needs may fear
being labeled as a nymphomaniac, which is sexiest and derogatory. Women are human beings
with sexual urges and desires. They should feel free and open to talk to their partner when they
want to engage in sexual activity. For us to conquer sexism we must realize that women and men
are equals, and feel many of the same things, and have similar urges, and that’s normal and ok.
- What you’re willing to try defines your sex life.
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People have their off days, and there are some sexual acts that one may never choose to do
because they don’t agree with it or find it attractive. What do you in the bedroom and what you
engage in does not determine how good your sex life is. There are plently of times where sex
won’t be the best or you won’t “perform” your best and that’s ok. Hell, there may even be a bad
sex month, but it doesn’t mean your sex life is bad, and the activities you choose to participate in, or
not to participate in do not determine how “good” your sex life is.