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Sex + Relationships

5 Sex Myths to Stop Believing

Sex can be, and should be enjoyable and fun. But, sex can be confusing and the lines of what it should 

be like are blurred. With sex information becoming so accessible on the internet and through word of mouth, it can 

be a blessing and a curse. We are often taught through peers and the internet about what sex should be like,

what you are doing “right,” and what you are doing “wrong.” The internet as some interesting opinions on what your sex 

life should be like, however, there are many myths. 

 

Here are 5 myths we need to stop believing about sex. 

Painful sex is normal.

Pain during sex, especially during penetration is not normal, not healthy. There shouldn’t be any sharp 

pain or burning during sex. If you’re in pain, it could mean you’re not producing enough natural 

lubricant and that there is a lot of friction. Friction can cause tearing and vaginal infections. If sex 

is painful stop and don’t go forward, tell your partner. Invest in lubricants, spend more time on

foreplay, or even try changing sex positions. 

Porn is an accurate representation.

Ummm, no. Pornography is not an accurate representation how sex should be. It can be degrading to 

women, forcing them into situations they may not like and using language not every women finds 

sexy. Porn is often overly dramatized; not everyone screams that loud during sex, and not everybody 

looks like that. You should not feel pressured or intimidated by porn, and you do not need to “act” to please 

your partner. Also, some positions and activities depicted can be dangerous to your body. Do what feels right,

and only do what you feel comfortable with. Be yourself and enjoy the experience without expectations or comparison!

You always have to be “in the mood.”

Many women may be terrified to not be sexually available to their partner at all times.  You are not a sex machine, you are not only there to please your partner only and you don’t owe 

anyone, anything. Sex is a two way street, and you should want to engage in sex with your 

partner too. Sex should not be chore and not should only be pleasurable for one party involved. 

It’s much more enjoyable when both parties are actively engaged and excited!

Initiation is a man’s job.

Women are told to not bring up when they want to have sex or when they are sexually aroused 

because it’s a “mans job.” Women who are open about their sexual desires and needs may fear

being labeled as a nymphomaniac, which is sexiest and derogatory. Women are human beings

with sexual urges and desires. They should feel free and open to talk to their partner when they 

want to engage in sexual activity. For us to conquer sexism we must realize that women and men

 are equals, and feel many of the same things, and have similar urges, and that’s normal and ok. 

What you’re willing to try defines your sex life.

People have their off days, and there are some sexual acts that one may never choose to do 

because they don’t agree with it or find it attractive. What do you in the bedroom and what you 

engage in does not determine how good your sex life is. There are plently of times where sex 

won’t be the best or you won’t “perform” your best and that’s ok. Hell, there may even be a bad 

sex month, but it doesn’t mean your sex life is bad, and the activities you choose to participate in, or 

not to participate in do not determine how “good” your sex life is. 

Kate Puim

U Alberta '24

Visual Communications graduate turned psychology student. I'm a master at finding affordable beauty products and stylish outfits. I dig coffee, chocolate, bold lipstick and pandas. Mental health advocate and your new best friend.
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