There it was…white strappy kitten heels that screamed Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and The City, in the back of my closet. I wanted to wear them so badly but no one wears heels to school anymore, so why would I? They were too impractical, too extra. But maybe I was, too. Then it hit me, when did we stop dressing for ourselves? I mean it’s so confusing because in social media you see fully decked out fits that are to die for, or you spot a certain someone in a coffee shop that looks right out of a magazine…they’re dressing for the plot. It was enough to make me wonder, why did we stop dressing like we’re in a story?”
Maybe fashion isn’t vanity… maybe it’s one of the few ways we still get to decide how the world sees us, even when we’re still figuring out how we see ourselves. Every morning, our closets ask us one quiet question: Who do you want to be today? What inspiration can we take from icons like Carrie when deciding who we want to be perceived as?
Out On The Town
When I walk around my university, I notice a few things: outfits to die for, casual wear, trendy items, the performative types, and a few people taking a chance on something unique. I admire all of these people for taking their own risks in everyday life. And if you think about it, in a certain way, we’re all performing. Whether you’re wearing the newest lulu jacket since it’s trendy, heels because you love the click of them in the hallways, or a sweatshirt because you don’t care about ‘trying as hard as others’. The white kitten heels weren’t the only thing I’ve put down. Sometimes I feel like I’m trying too hard with my outfits, that people will judge me or that I shouldn’t wear an item because I slightly look like a kindergarten teacher. However, there’s a reason I was drawn to the heels, and feel good wearing that “extra” outfit. And then it hit me-when did we start calling effort a bad thing? How do we use fashion to our advantage?
The Carrie Bradshaw Effect
Recently, I’ve been watching Sex and the City in all my free time, and one thing I noticed is that the girls didn’t care at all what others thought of their outfits. Carrie wore heels everywhere (and would have picked up the strappy kitten heels without a second thought), Sam was extravagant in her fur coats, Charlotte never went to work without looking like an office siren and Miranda made business casual look like the new it girl. Fashion isn’t only about looking good-it’s about feeling something. The girls’ wardrobe was storytelling that favored emotion over impression. I mean Carrie nailed the hopeful and innocent writer when we see her in the tutu during the intro, but reclaims status and identity as a New York figure with her designer dresses and bags (I need that Dior Saddle Bag). Sometimes while I was watching I noticed a sporadic outfit and I was like: what is going on here? But after looking at it for a little longer I began to like it more, the outfits don’t have to make sense as long as they make you feel powerful and create identity. Even though we all might not have the same fashion sense, we can express ourselves to others through our style. You don’t have to get approval from others as long as you love what you see in the mirror. And maybe that’s what Carrie taught us, it’s not about approval. It’s about feeling confident in what you wear.
Speaking Fashion
Once you stop listening to boring opinions and start reaching for the white strappy kitten heels, you realize how fashion brings confidence and fantasy into a chaotic world. We subconsciously see this all the time, from lucky rings, small trends to fit in, or even splurging on luxuries. This is that silent communication I mentioned before. This idea of speaking through fashion can also be interpreted by the individual. Maybe this looks like wearing a skirt on a Monday because you want to have a great start to the beginning of the week and you love skirts. Or perhaps it’s wearing a tie and accessorizing extra on an exam day because you want to feel put together. Maybe you put on glasses and a beret to go to the coffee shop because you want to channel the inner fall season and productivity of studying. These are the ways people are rediscovering fashion as a way to romanticize their life and dress for the plot.
Heel Theory
Last Monday, I had the courage to put on the white strappy kitten heels. I have to confess, it wasn’t to school, but it was to a coffee shop…so progress. I thought about how much I adored them, Carrie’s shoe collection, and the undeniable match they were to my inner sense of style. After all that, I couldn’t not wear them. That night I felt the most confident I had in a while, maybe it was the extra inch or maybe it was the fact that the heels were the cherry on top to my babydoll dress, I’ll never know. Either way, when I got home, instead of hiding the heels behind my hanging clothes, I placed them on top of my dresser with my everyday shoes—almost like a reminder to keep dressing for myself, no matter what others think.
In the end, maybe we dress, not for approval, but as proof that we’re still showing up for ourselves and the story we write every day.