An Open Letter to the Friend Who Shares Their Netflix Account With You

To that special someone,

I think I was broken before you. Before you, I was in a world of constant interruptions. I spent hours searching for things that I could never seem to find, and if I did find what I was looking for, it never lived up to its potential. I would sometimes get so frustrated that I felt like giving up.

But everything’s changed since you’ve come into my life. Since you decided to share with me something not many others were worthy enough to have of yours.

No, I’m not talking about passion. I’m not talking about love.

I’m talking about your Netflix account.

You know exactly who you are. How could you not? One click on the "Watch It Again" list and you can see just how many shows I’m capable of going through over winter break; the multitude of movies starring Matt Damon I’ve seen during the semester; the countless times I’ve re-watched that one episode of It’s Always Sunny when I needed a good laugh.

Ohh my friend. My beautiful, sweet, caring friend. I don’t think you realize how much joy you unintentionally brought into my life. There's no way you could have known- I didn’t even know at the time. I had no idea that my offhand complaint about being forced to watch ads on Hulu two years ago would lead you to utter the most important seven words of my college experience:

“Do you just want my Netflix password?”

Did I—did I want?? Did I want to have access to hundreds of shows and movies? Did I want thousands of hours worth of entertainment at my naïve, nineteen-year old fingertips??

And hours of entertainment are what I got. Series after series of television programs. Movies. Poorly made sequels to those movies. Documentaries. Mini-series. The making of said mini-series.

I watched and watched and I continue to watch because of you.

But as grateful as I have been for you giving me your account information, I’m sure there are times you wish you had never done it. Times like…

 

When we’re watching the same show at different times and I screw up where you’re at in the series

When I logged into Netflix on my brother’s PlayStation, and he may or may not still be using your account…

Or when I accidentally started watching that erotic film, but didn’t realize it was an erotic film until I had already committed and felt compelled to finish it, and now there are some questionable recommendations on your feed.

So for all of this, I’m sorry. I truly am. And I’ll get better, I promise. But in the meantime, I hope you know that you’re helping me in so many ways... 

 

To Netflix and chill is now possible because of you. And so is, I suppose, to “Netflix and chill(??)”

My topics for small talk have vastly increased over the years

Why yes, I have seen Master of None and I think it’s a compelling and fresh storyline with a wonderfully diverse cast.

 

And because of you, I now have a breadth of information on the American mafia through mindlessly watching Inside the American Mob over the break.

So my friend, I know I’ve said this before, but I will continue to fervently say it again and again: Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU for sharing your Netflix with me. I love you so very much.

And please- PLEASE don’t ever change…your password.