First, I will start by saying congratulations. You actually made it to the library, so good for you. However, if you are partaking in the following behaviors, I- and other patrons of Howard Tilton Memorial Library- are BEGGING you to please stop.
1. Securing an ideal spot during peak hours… just to spend the entire time scrolling through Facebook and Twitter. What is wrong with you? Everyone can see what you’re doing, and they ARE judging you.
2. Sitting on the quiet floors and giggling with your friends. Just stop. No one thinks your inside jokes are funny, and everyone IS judging you.
3. Eating loud and/or smelly snacks. What are you thinking? Stop crinkling your bag of chips and eat grapes quietly out of bed like a responsible adult.
4. Talking on the phone. Until recently, I was unaware that people even did this. This is so rude, even more rude than talking to your friends on the quiet floors. You can talk on the phone literally anywhere. Don’t do it in the library.
5. Looking cute. Stop wearing cute outfits to the library. You make me sad because it makes it even more noticeable that I look like I crawled out of a garbage can. Ok, so this isn’t really such a bad thing. I am just old and bitter. Good for you for looking cute AND studying.