We all know that person who loves sugar more than anything else. That person who, despite what doctors tell them, continue to pop chocolates like Tylenol and fall asleep with Twizzlers in their bed. I, unfortunately, am that person. And while I have come to terms with my sugary hankerings, others are not so quick to accept their dependency. If you’re still on the fence about your true, saccharine colors, here are some signs that will clear up whether or not you have a major sweet tooth.
1. Halloween is your favorite time of year.
2. It’s not that regular food sounds bad; it’s just that sugary food sounds better.
3. You constantly have the “I don’t want diabetes but…” internal reasoning.
But I should be happy. But if I eat this, I’ll eat healthier next time. But I’m going to get it anyway, so might as well indulge in those sweet, buttery pastries filled with jelly before my pancreas stops producing insulin.
4. The only alcohol that sounds good to you is when the sugar content is equal/above the alcohol content.
I’d like everything mixed with Malibu, please and thank you.
5. You have a “secret” stash of your favorite candy/snack…
6. And your friends, family, and loved ones know better than to delve into that hoard.
7. Your answer to a quick breakfast? Poptarts. Haven’t had dinner? Brownies with ~wine~. Low on nutrition? Vitamin…gummies.
8. You get these looks from friends when they see your side of the pantry:
9. You’ve considered ordering just dessert at restaurants to um…save money.
10. At coffee shops, you’re more interested in the baked goods than the coffee…
hellooo display of freshly baked muffins
11. And if you’re getting coffee, your response to if you want whipped cream on top is always
12. Long nights of studying = gorging on cookies because Oreos are the only thing that understand you.
13. You have dreams of desserts.
14. People question your maximum capacity for sugar intake
15. But you know deep down in your candy heart, that there truly is none.