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12 Signs You’re a “Target-aholic”

Most human beings enjoy a nice trip to Target every once in a while to pick up such necessities as shampoo, snacks, pens, or any combination considering Target has anything and everything you could ever need. However, some of us spend a little more time (and money) than the average person in Target earning the title of “Target-aholic”. If you relate to any of the following, you may be a “Target-aholic” as well.

1. You walk into Target for a tube of toothpaste and end up with a cart (or two or three) full of food, clothes, and throw pillows that you don’t need, but have to have. Also, when you go in and come out with less than a full cart you feel a bit of pride because of the amazing self-restraint you demonstrated.

2. On your way to the toiletries, a strategically placed skirt catches your eye and you can’t help but take a quick trip to the clothing section.

3. However, as you walk through the skirts, shirts, and shorts, you notice something familiar. You think to yourself, “Aren’t these the same clothes that I saw when I was here earlier today?” They are, of course, but two shirts are always better than one!

4. As obsessed Target shoppers, watches and clocks are two of our worst enemies. Yes, thirty minutes have passed and you still don’t have the one thing you intended to buy, but the only thing more precious than our time is Target. Therefore, time spent in Target is never time wasted!

5. Like any true “Target-aholic”, you refer to Target as “Targé” with a faux-French accent because you know that Target deserves more credit than it gets for all of the wonder on the inside. 

6. When “Alex from Target” became popular you felt a little betrayed because you could easily be “____ from Target”. You thought about how you spend just as much time in Target as Alex does (if not more) and contemplated strategies to get your picture to circulate the Internet as the next Target social media sensation.

7. The only thing that can make your Target shopping experience better is a friend to share it with you. If you have a parent, friend, or stranger who enjoys Target just as much as you do, hold onto that person as tightly as you can because he or she may be your soul mate. 

8. The various themed sections make your seasons so much better. Because of the multitude of Halloween pumpkin decorations, the scented pinecone arrangements during the winter holidays, and the heart shaped everything for Valentine’s Day, you find inspiration to decorate your home in accordance with each new season. 

9. Your Target REDcard is your prized possession. Five percent may not seem like a lot, but when you visit Target multiple times a week, and end up with a full cart each time, anything can help. Even if you don’t have a REDcard, you know that saying no each time the cashier asks you to sign up at check out is much harder than it should be.

10. Luckily, your favorite designers appreciate Target just as much as you do. From Lilly Pulitzer to Alexander McQueen, Target works with the latest designers to sell clothing for much less than the usual aking price making Target your one stop shop for household supplies, movies, and even designer clothing. Just make sure you bring your Target maneuvering a-game because they sell out fast!

11. During any trip to Target you can direct your fellow patrons to the aisle with their shopping list items. You may even wear a red shirt and some khaki pants if you feel like really giving back to your community.

12. Overall, Target makes everything better…even back to school. By far, the “Back to School” area takes the cake as Target’s grandest display. Despite the fact that Target begins to promote back to school when we still have summer on our minds, the vast array of pencils, notebooks, and three hole punches can excite anyone for the school year ahead. 

Ultimately, we all have a little bit of a “Target-aholic” in us and that wonderful fact will benefit us in the long run. Who doesn’t need three different types of face wash and more yogurt than anyone could ever eat (it was a 10 for $10 sale!)? Be proud of who you are because who you are is a “Target-aholic”!

My name is Madison and I am from Glen Mills, PA! I am currently a senior at Tulane and am excited to be Tulane's Campus Correspondent this year.
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