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Love Guru on Life Lessons

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Tufts chapter.

Freshman year is long gone, and job and grad school applications have taken over. While it feels like we were all just at our first college parties yesterday, so many things have changed. Friend groups have gone through trials and tribulations, significant others have come and gone, and many of our perspectives have changed on topics like love and future occupations.

Let’s be honest—freshman year we all came in to campus doe-eyed and excited for the new freedom and opportunities of college life. Now, that same experience is coming to an end and we’re all facing new challenges, opportunities, and journeys. Unlike senior year in high school, we don’t all have the same goal—to get into college. Some people will be working next year, others will go on to get their masters and doctorates, and some may even take a year off to explore and find their calling. Uncertainty is okay, though, and it’s important to embrace change and accept life’s unexpected twists and turns.

This is why I wanted to focus my last post as your Tufts Love Guru on change, and give some advice from some personal lessons I have learned over the past four years. These tips are not all love-based, but I promise that you’ll find them useful. Everyone experiences different things at different points in life, so I hope my advice can help younger Jumbos and my fellow seniors alike.

1. Be true to yourself.

This may sound over stated and cliché, but it’s so easy to get caught up in the loop of things and lose sight of who you truly are. In college, everyone wants to belong to certain groups and get involved, but that should never come at the expense of losing oneself. Real friends and good significant others will like you for being yourself. They’ll appreciate your quirks and embrace them.


2. Embrace your relationships.

When I say relationships, I don’t just mean your romantic ones—I mean your family relationships and your friendships. Make sure that you let the people you care about know how much you care because no relationship should ever be taken for granted. Sometimes, our friends or family are going through troubling times and sometimes they may change a little, but the best thing we can do is let them know that we’re here for them and we’ll support them unconditionally.


3. Accept the unexpected.

It’s a fact of life that things will happen when you least expect them. I’ve had family members diagnosed with cancer, romantic opportunities pop up out of nowhere, and I’ve lost loved ones. Change can be really scary and hard to accept, but it’s inevitable. Take some time to heal and come to terms with it, but don’t dwell on it for too long. In the end, life goes on, and you don’t one to be that person that is caught up in the past.  


4. Keep an open mind.

When I first came to Tufts, I thought that this campus was way too liberal for me and I had a hard time adjusting. I didn’t take certain classes and stayed away from particular friend groups because I didn’t want to put myself in uncomfortable situations. As time went on, I realized that my closed-mindedness was limiting my college experience. I started talking to more people, met some of my closest friends, and took courses that I never imagined that I would succeed in. Keeping an open mind is key to facing any type of adversity. It can be hard at times, but it’s certainly worth it.


5. Learn to communicate.

Of all of the lessons that I have to share, I think that this is the most important. Countless times, I see all sorts of relationships fall apart due to lack of communication. Many people are afraid to say how they feel because they find it awkward or embarrassing, but keeping it in, often makes the situation worse. You will never know what is on another person’s mind until you ask. Just communicate.


6. Privacy is okay.

In a time where social media is so big and we all like to share our experiences, it is key to understand the importance of a little privacy. Everyone doesn’t need to know about your latest hook-up, the troubles within your relationship or family, the personal tribulations that you are facing, or even the latest thoughts on your mind. It’s okay to embrace social media, but know your boundaries. Everyone who follows you on Snapchat should not know every detail about your life.


7. Networking is key.

You probably have heard your parents say this before, but I think it’s so important to reiterate it. They say that 50% of the interesting opportunities in life happen through random connections. Your Tufts education and past experiences will help you with the job hunt, but your connections will set you apart from thousands of other candidates that hand in similar resumes. Chat up the kind stranger on the train, talk to your parents’ friends, get involved at dinner parties, and take all the opportunities that you are given to connect.


8. Don’t let your mistakes define you.

Let’s be honest—as humans, we all make mistakes. Some are graver than others, but in the end, it’s how we deal with these mistakes that says the most about us. You may forget a date’s name during dinner, accidentally hurt a friend, or make a bad decision on a night out. No matter what the mistake is admit that you got it wrong, learn from the incident, and move on. It’s okay to move on. Dwelling on your mistakes will probably make you miserable, but learning from them and getting past them will make you a stronger and better person.


9. Trust your heart.

Once again, this sounds a little cliché, but there’s some truth to it. Although it’s good to be practical in life, sometimes you just have to follow your heart. My senior year in high school, I fell in love for the first time, but we had to do long distance and he was a couple of years older. Instead of overthinking the situation, I followed my heart and gave love a chance. Although we are no longer together, I learned more from that relationship than any other. It may not have been the most practical of decisions, but it was definitely worth it.


These are just some lessons I’ve learned over the past years, and I hope that you can embrace and use them in your own life experiences. I’m only a college senior and admit that I have a lot more to learn, but at least I can help my friends and colleagues with those lessons that life has already brought my way. It’s been a great ride as your Love Guru, and I wish everyone the best of luck.


Your Tufts Love Guru



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Tufts Love Guru Here. I give advice on all those love dilemmas that collegiette's have!