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Love Guru on Ghosting and Hook-ups

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Tufts chapter.

Hey, Jumbos. Love Guru here! This week, I finally get to answer my readers’ questions about love, and I’m excited to help out. Here are some of the love dilemmas your fellow Jumbos are facing.

Dear Love Guru,

The boy I was hanging out with ghosted me, and I don’t know where to go from here. Am I not his type anymore? What’s going on?

-Recently Ghosted

Dear Recently Ghosted,

You deserve way better than this guy. Ghosting is a sign of cowardice. If people can’t tell you face-to-face that they’re no longer interested, then they’re not even worth your time. I can’t really tell you why this boy has done this because I don’t know any details, but I can tell you to stop trying to analyze the situation. Why he ended it shouldn’t matterhe ended it. A lot of people tend to over analyze situations and make them more complicated than they are, and a lot of boys are simpler than that (trust me, I grew up of with three brothers). This relationship wasn’t meant to be, and it’s time to move on! There’s a definitely a better man for you out there, so don’t worry about this one too much. Have a little fun, and put yourself out there. Ghost boy does not deserve your attention. In fact, he doesn’t deserve you at all. Keep your head up, and meet new guys.



Dear Love Guru,

How do I tell a hookup buddy of many months that I either need more or that it needs to end?


Dear Confused,

I hate to be the person to tell you this, but most hookup buddies don’t end up dating–unlike what Rom-Coms have tried to teach us. If you wanted to date this person, you should have made it clear at the start. Now, you have a routine, and s/he seems to be perfectly fine with it; trying to get your hookup buddy to commit now is unlikely. In fact, most college students aren’t seeking relationships. There are a certain few that want them, but they’re not the type to hook up with people without attempting to commit. Giving your hookup buddy an ultimatum won’t make the situation any better; s/he’ll most likely break things off with you. If you really want something more, it’s time to end this on your terms. You can tell him/her that you’re ending things ‘cause you need more from your relationship, but just be aware that this person won’t chase you. This situation has run its course, but if you’re looking for a relationship, try going on some dates. Those people will never take you for granted, and you probably won’t end up in a situation like this ever again.
I hope my advice will help Recently Ghosted and Confused, but I also hope it helps the rest of my readers. These situations are so common in the college scene, and the least I can do is help my fellow Jumbos out a little. Keep on sending your latest love dilemmas in here, and I promise to get back to you!


Tufts Love Guru Here. I give advice on all those love dilemmas that collegiette's have!