By Allie Thomas
College can be a rollercoaster of ups and downs that may throw you for a loop. One minute you’re riding the high of seeing your long-distance friends, and the next, you get a bad grade on an assignment you spent twelve hours on. I can honestly say that without my friends, I would not have been able to get through half the crap thrown my way. This article is dedicated to all my wonderful friends, to whom I couldn’t be more grateful. An ode to them, if you will.
This week last year, I lost one of my childhood best friends. He was indescribable, genuinely the most predictably unpredictable person I’ve ever met. I didn’t know what to do with myself, so I continued going to school during the day and crying my eyes out at night. It was a ritual that became familiar as the days and weeks dragged on. Just when I started to get used to the numbness, another old friend reached out to me and told me he was going to take me out for boba and didn’t leave room for objections. They picked me up and paid for my tea and listened to my sob story for hours, even though they were also grieving. I don’t know if he knows how much that means to me to this day. Not only did they do that once, but when our other friend came home from school, he took us out again and made us dinner. We spent the entire time talking, which we hadn’t done since high school. That’s the beauty of friends. I don’t need to speak to them every day to know that I still have love for them in my heart and want to see them doing better. I couldn’t be prouder of my baby journalist and little nurse. Just good people with good hearts. Really, they reminded me that I’m not the only one feeling this loss, and there is something, unfortunately, comforting in not being alone in that way.
A loss like that sort of puts things into perspective for me. Particularly, how easy it is to take the love and joy that friends bring for granted when it genuinely is such a wonderful blessing to have. You know, he wasn’t perfect by any means, but I loved him anyway and still do. I always will. Friendships aren’t about having the “perfect relationship.” It’s about appreciating what you have while it’s in front of you and meeting people where they’re at instead of punishing them for where you want them to be. Not every friend is going to be slumber parties in your underwear, best man toast, bury you in the ground close, but every friendship is meaningful and should be cherished, however fleeting.
Friendships are priceless, but they are also work. It takes work to build relationships, and occasionally that means inconveniencing yourself. Now that doesn’t mean going against your morals or anything, and take note that not everyone has your best interests at heart. It does, however, mean showing up even when you might not feel like it, because you would want someone to do the same for you. I have a friend whom I call once every 4-5 months, and we catch up for an hour and go back to our lives. That’s where he is communication-wise, and I can meet him there. Heck, my closest cousin, I only see for three days straight once a year, and it’s like no time has passed. College is a busy time, but I will ensure that I keep up with my friends when I can because I want to maintain these friendships that mean so much to me.
I love my friends very much, and I go to bed giddy every night knowing that they love me too.