Tell me if this sounds familiar: the movie you’ve waited for has finally arrived in theatres. Unfortunately, all your friends are booked and busy, so coordinating is literally impossible. The unthinkable happens: you are forced to go alone. Despite every instinct telling you to stay home, you reluctantly go by yourself, intimidated by what other folks might think of you.
Well, this was me not too long ago. I was ashamed of going to events alone. It felt like everybody’s eyes were on me, silently shaming me for not having a plus one.
This past summer, it finally clicked. Why should I care what other people think of me?
Granted, I should have known this earlier but better late than never, right? And so began my journey of self-discovery…sort of. Desperate to fight my initial embarrassment of doing things alone, I made small but monumental steps in learning to get comfortable in my presence.
Back in August, I went to see Top Gun: Maverick. It was my first time going to the theatres to watch a movie…alone. Thankfully, the theatres were emptier than usual, which helped ease me into my quest of learning to enjoy being on my own. In the end, I realized that I probably enjoyed the movie more than if I had brought a friend who was not as passionate! I got to geek out to the references of the original 1986 film Top Gun, and more importantly, I had fun!
Emboldened by my experience going to the Cineplex theatre alone, I bought tickets to see In Conversation With Issa Rae at the Just For Laughs Festival. Having recently binge-watched Insecure on Crave and falling in love with the show, I had my mind set on seeing her in person. Even though I knew nobody who had watched the series, I felt weirdly okay with the idea of going alone. Slowly but surely, I was making progress!
September 24th came along, and I could finally cross off seeing the legend herself, Issa Rae, in person on my bucket list.
Finally, this past reading week, I saw Singin’ In The Rain at the Princess of Wales Theatre, you guessed it, alone! As a massive fan of the original 1952 movie, I was adamant about seeing the live musical version. It allowed me to get out of my comfort zone and talk to the strangers sitting around me before and during intermission. On my left, I met this couple visiting from Mumbai, India, who explained to me that they visit Toronto yearly for a week. On my right, I had a pleasant conversation with a guy about rush tickets and the luck and dedication involved with securing last-minute theatre tickets.
Don’t get me wrong. Doing all these activities with somebody else would have been fun too, but there was something incredibly liberating about experiencing these events alone. As cheesy as it sounds, I grew as a person. I learned to enjoy my own company without fear of judgment from others. Speaking to strangers, for example, was a huge step for me. One of the best parts was that I didn’t have to worry about anyone else. After a while, you get used to it.
But enough about me. If you’re interested in learning how to do things alone, continue reading below for a list of simple activities to start your journey.
Suggestions on how to start doing things alone
Great! You’ve come this far, and now you’re wondering: How do I find the confidence to do things alone and learn how to enjoy my own company?
My number one tip? Take it step by step.
Here are three activities to get started:
- Go for a walk in the park
You’ve probably heard it before. Going on walks is good for your overall well-being. In addition to the neverending list of benefits, that comes with walking, the best part is you can choose where and how long your walk is. From my personal experience, being alone with my thoughts in a green space has helped me process ideas while helping me to de-stress. If you’re looking for an easy way to start doing things alone, start walking!
- Going to a movie
When you think about it, when you watch a film in the theatres, all you have to do is sit there and watch the movie! There’s no time to talk to whoever you’re going with except maybe before the film starts. This makes this activity a simple first step in embarking on your journey.
- Eat out at a restaurant
Honestly, this one’s a bit tough. The bright side is you can choose the restaurant you want to eat at without backlash. However, once you get past the initial loneliness, you’ll realize how heightened your senses are when you eat the food. In other words, you will become more mindful of your surroundings and the food itself. Somehow, the food tastes better! If you want, bring a book to make the meal more enjoyable.
In conclusion, I highly recommend that others start learning to do things alone. Not only does it boost your independence, but it is incredibly gratifying. The only tricky part is just getting started. Once you do, I promise you it will have been worth it.