My heart drops when I hear the words “Cuffing Season”. It kills me. Can’t stand it. But, no matter how much I despise it, I do believe that it is a thing-for lack of a better word-AND, I lowkey hope that this season will be different than the last few cuffing seasons. Maybe, I will find someone to sling my cuffs on. Everyone jokes about how they are taking applications for this cuffing season’s “bae” or trying to “get chose”, but underneath all of this silliness that I hate and love all at once, hides a bunch of problems we all face.
First of all, finding someone that you are interested in is not easy. We all say that we want someone we are physically and intellectually attracted to, keep it simple and fun, etc. Let’s be real. I say it. You say it. We all say it. But, those opportunities are always in front of us and although we take advantage of some, many slip under the rug. I can confirm that firsthand. Sometimes I’m simple and sometimes I’m picky, which I think is reasonable. Yes, there are obvious options, but most of the time I’m not 100% for it. I acknowledge the idea and shrug it off because it doesn’t feel right.
When I find someone that I am interested in I make it known. I hate playing games and wasting time. If I am interested in you, you will know immediately. No hesitation or anything. Here is my biggest problem with trying to “cuff” someone: if I am actively pursuing you, please don’t assume I’m thinking about placing a label on our status or thinking about our “fairy-tale” future together. If I text you first, ask you how your day is, or ask to spend time with you, don’t jump the gun. The only thing I am thinking about at this point is hanging out and figuring out if I genuinely like you. My friend put it perfectly, “Everyone assumes I’m clingy, but I just care. I am interested.” I think everyone needs to either kill the politeness and be honest if uninterested or shamelessly pursue a potential “bae” if you are interested.
The truth is, ladies and gents face this problem regularly. We make up imaginary rules to follow a criterion for our potential “baes” and end up annoyed with a situation we created. My hope for myself and for all others is this: If someone seems eager when they’re simply putting themselves out there, try not to assume they’re “thirsty”, clingy or a straight-up dog. Be vulnerable. Be open. And be shameless with your feelings. If you’re interested, you are interested. Stop playing around and start utilizing those rusty cuffs you keep tossing in the closet!