The final part to this series I started my freshman year at TCU is bittersweet to write. During the fall 2023, The Eras Tour was going strong, Barbie had dominated the summer, and I started my freshman year. The freshman year playlist was the first article I wrote for Her Campus. I remember thinking that my goal was to write a follow up to my article every year and I am happy to now complete this goal.
The feeling of senior year is so contradictory: everything now feels so familiar and yet the changes over the years are glaringly obvious. TCU is expanding construction across campus, and I no longer call a dorm room home; so much more has changed since I first stepped on campus. Senior year is a year of reckoning with constant lasts and the inevitability of change. To freeze time would be to sacrifice my own opportunities and growth. And just like my senior year of high school, when I felt overwhelmed by all the emotions that came with senior year, I again find comfort in music. Taylor Swift has always been an incredible songwriter: her ability to capture a wide range of experiences and emotions in her music is a gift to every listener.
“22”
“Everything will be alright if we just keep dancing like we’re twenty-two”
This may be one of the most recognizable Taylor Swift songs ever. Ever since its debut, it has become a staple for birthday parties. As someone who is turning 22 this year, I feel like it’s finally my time to get to listen to this song in all its glory. The song is a brilliant balance of upbeat pop and lyrics that at a second glance reveal the depth of Swift’s writing in her Red album.
“It feels like a perfect night for breakfast at midnight. To fall in love with strangers.”
A simple night going out with friends is a beautiful part of youth. Going with the flow and seeing where the night takes you (with the right people) can end in stories that will last a lifetime.
“We’re happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time. It’s miserable and magical, oh, yeah”
This is where the depth of the song begins to show. Swift is not only catching youth in all its unplanned fun but also in its finitude. The end of college and a person’s 20s are full of possibilities but also full of difficult questions. When the night ends and the world grows quiet again, those questions of what you are doing and what you will do become louder. The loneliness comes in each person taking a different path, and the magic comes in doing it with people you have spent years building friendship with.
“Tonight’s the night when we forget about the deadlines. Its time.”
Letting yourself enjoy the moment is so important because change is always coming. Enjoy the fun, the time with friends, and the magic of not having all the answers. Senior year feels encapsulated in this song in such a beautiful way.
“nothing new”
“They tell you while you’re young, ‘Girls, go out and have your fun’, then they hunt and slay the ones who actually do it”
The second song of Swift’s to explore what it means to be twenty-two looks at aging as a much sadder loss of innocence. The collaboration with Phoebe Bridgers looks at the transition of identity from 18-22, correlating exactly with my college years. At 18, the world is wide, but the plan is steady: go to class, do well, and push yourself out of your comfort zone. At 22, it’s more complicated: the path after college is less clear, but it’s still filled with opportunity. At 22, the achievements look different for everyone, and comparing yourself with others can hurt your confidence.
“Lord, what will become of me. Once I’ve lost my novelty?”
Swift explores the loss of innocence and newness that comes with age. The challenge of change and how it forces changes in one’s own identity is expressed beautifully in this song.
“And I wake up in the middle of the night it’s like I can feel time moving. How can a person know everything at 18 but nothing at 22?”
The moment you truly realize you are a senior and think about preparing for a year full of lasts is heavy. Time suddenly feels like it’s been put on 2x speed, and the days fly by.
“I know someday I’m gonna meet her, it’s a fever dream. The kind of radiance you only have at 17. She’ll know the way, and then she’ll say she got the map from me”
At the beginning of August, I had my last ever sorority primary recruitment. Getting to see all of the women I have recruited step up and lead the next group of women into our chapter was such a gift. It felt nostalgic to talk with potential new member (PNM) freshman who are on campus for the first time as TCU students. It reminded me of myself freshman year — so full of excitement and homesickness. I passed on the same advice I was given by my sorority big when I was just a PNM: take it all in and take care of yourself. Recruitment can be emotionally and physically draining with long days, rejection, and hot weather; taking care of yourself, whether you are a recruiter, Rho Gamma, or PNM, is so important.
To any freshman who may be reading this: lean on the older girls; they have been through it and can offer you an ear to listen. To the seniors: you remember how scary and overwhelming college could be; look out for the younger girls. Time goes by fast. All you can do is help the next group.
“Dear Reader”
“Dear reader, burn all the files, desert all your past lives. And if you don’t recognize yourself, that means you did it right”
Now I know I just talked about giving advice, but it’s important that, no matter whose advice it is, you take it with a grain of salt. After all, your needs, emotions, and situation are different from someone else’s. In this line, Swift addresses the fact that many find life lessons and advice in her songs, and, sometimes, she is an unreliable narrator. She also dives into identity change and growing from hardship; she lets it break her, and she rebuilds herself differently each time.
“Dear reader, bend when you can, snap when you have to. Dear reader, you don’t have to answer, just ’cause they asked you”
As women, we are often told to forgive, empathize, and look at things from another perspective. We are told to analyze rather than feel, but sometimes snapping is the answer. In college, you will navigate many situations; it is important to strike a balance between letting things roll off your back and standing up for yourself.
“But darling, darling, please you wouldn’t take my word for it if you knew who was talking”
Swift herself has faced many personal and professional challenges and asks the listen (or reader) not think that she is so accomplished that she is perfect. She is still human and is always learning, and I think that this is an important lesson as a get ready to finish college: I will never stop learning. I may not have midterms and finals, but I will be tested, and I will learn constantly.
“The Manuscript”
“Now and then she rereads the manuscript of the entire torrid affair”
This may be one of my absolute favorite Swift songs (up there with “the lakes”). Swift reflects on all 12 of her previous albums, looking at them as her life’s work so far. This album, and this song specifically, closes the chapter of her youth and looks towards her future. It is a final look back at what she has been through. My own departmental project, google drive, and degrees will serve as my version of my college manuscript, a collection of my work, tears, and fears, which I will soon put away as I move on to the next chapter.
“And the years passed, like scenes of a show. The Professor said to write what you know lookin’ backwards. Might be the only way to move forward”
In my case, I take this line literally as a film major. I look back at my high school short film, and I can see all my mistakes but also all the joy I had in making it. It helps motivate me to keep pushing and growing my skills in film.
“The only thing that’s left is the manuscript. One last souvenir from my trip to your shores. Now and then I reread the manuscript but the story isn’t mine anymore”
Swift is not the same person as the woman who wrote her previous albums: she’s grown past those phases and enters a new one with this song. But she does not abandon her old self and old works; she still reflects on them.
I know I will always have more to learn from Taylor Swift’s music. What started as a fun idea for an article my freshman year has served as a diary of my time in college.