My freshman year started out like anyone else’s. I was so excited to move into a dorm and make friends on my floor. Before I knew it, I was swept up into a huge group of girl friends and we were closer than ever. That first semester was filled with long nights talking in our dorms, “family” breakfasts at Eick, and having the time of our lives. Coming into college, I never gave rushing a sorority a thought. It just didn’t seem like something I would do and I bought into a lot of the stereotypes I heard about Greek Life at first. As a headstrong, independent girl, it didn’t seem to make sense to rush. I didn’t really feel like a “sorority girl.” I’ve always been a very social person and didn’t really feel like I needed Greek Life to meet people.
IMG Source: Maddi Ference
However, my newfound friends all wanted to rush a sorority. I went to all the interest sessions and talked with so many amazing girls. But still, when the time came to sign up for recruitment, I decided not to. It felt like the only reason I was going to these events and even considering rushing was because everyone else was doing it. That didn’t seem like a good enough reason to me. Being the resident beauty guru, I did my friends hair and makeup the mornings of each day of recruitment, helped them accessorize their outfits, and off they went! I lived in Centennial freshman year and if you know anything about how Cent dorms are set up, you know that the halls are not co-ed. As soon as everyone left that first day of recruitment, it was absolutely silent in Centennial. I took this opportunity to catch up on studying and work work work, but I was happy and excited to see my friends at the end of the day. Despite them telling me about their day and their experiences throughout recruitment, I still never felt like I was missing out. I was very confident in my decision not to rush and stood by it firmly.
IMG Source: Maddi Ference.
The next year, my sorority friends would often ask me if I would consider rushing. My answer was always the same, “I just don’t think it’s for me,” and my friends never pressed me further than this. By this point, I had already kicked the stereotypes I had once heard to the curb, but as a stubborn person, I wanted to stand by my original decision. There were times that I had FOMO over the exclusivity of sororities and the fun events they go to, but I didn’t regret my decision.
A close friend from high school who goes to TCNJ is just like me: never saw herself rushing, didn’t feel she was the “type.” But, unlike me, she gave it a chance and found a whole new family and the best friends in her sorority. One thing she would always tell me is, “I never would have met this person if not for Greek Life and I’m so happy they’re in my life.” That really stuck with me and was a perspective I hadn’t really thought about before.
It wasn’t until my junior year, when I started living with two of my friends in the same sorority that I really started to think, “maybe I should have given this a chance.” Every one of their sisters I met, I had great conversations with and came away from it thinking that we could have been great friends. I learned so much from them about the benefits of being in Greek Life that I didn’t know before. There are so many wonderful people in greek life I wish I had the opportunity to meet and get close to, but our paths did not cross in our normal day to day lives. Now that I’m a senior, I don’t regret not rushing. I have made amazing friends across different majors and organizations. I even became the President of the Society of Women Engineers (#rushSWE) and to me, that has been where I’ve found my sisters. However, if I could go back I would at least go out for recruitment and give it a chance. I think if I had, my college experience would have been very different, yet I’m still happy and grateful for the experiences I’ve had regardless and I believe it’s all up to you where you choose to ‘find your family.’