By all appearances, I should not be writing this article. My circadian rhythm has been out of whack for at least two weeks, and I’m not doing well in my classes. For this article, I’ve already asked my editor for an extension 3 times — talk about irony!
But I can tell you that I’ve come a long way. Ever since I can remember, I wrestled with the feeling of overwhelm. I have complex ADHD, which greatly affects my day-to-day life, and at many points in my life, I also felt held back by prolonged social isolation and family problems. I’ve always wanted to be a writer, but I was frustrated by the creative blocks and terrified by the competitive career path that lied ahead. I wasn’t always sure if I could live an independent, successful life. Even though there are so many unknowns, I’m doing so many things I thought I’d never be able to do!
Right now it’s 3 AM and I’m typing vigorously in my half-cleaned dorm room. I had a god-awful day and I wanted to curl up in my bed–– but here I am, kept awake with caffeine and determination pumping through my veins. I have SO MUCH to do, but I’ll be fine. Over the years, I’ve become better at managing my time, and I’m confident that I’ll keep improving. So where did I learn all this stuff?
It certainly wasn’t on the worksheet handed out by my eleventh grade guidance counsellor, or on any of those pastel-hued infographics taking over my FYP. Oh, hell, no. I had to put my detective hat on and investigate my habits, my triggers, and my life. If you’re tired of vague, seemingly unattainable goals (Plan ahead of time. Eat well and exercise. Don’t be hard on yourself.) and patently obvious suggestions (Get a to-do-list. Get a calendar. Set timers. Gee, thanks, why didn’t I think of that?), SO AM I! Below is a glimpse of my philosophy for slaying my to-do-list… hopefully, it’ll inspire you in some way, shape, or form.
Be strategic about location.
My roommates can attest: I’m a giant sleepyhead. I usually set my alarm to 6:30, but half of the time, I pass out after opening my phone. Sometimes, I’ll even manage to brush my teeth and take a shower, and still find myself in bed at 10 AM.
In my universe, power naps don’t exist. It baffles me that some people can sleep for 10, 15, 20 minutes and wake up refreshed, let alone capable of sound reasoning needed to decide against going back to sleep. Call me a weakling, but I can’t turn down those tantalizing ZZZs, even though it means that I’ll wake up grouchy, with even less time to complete the homework that I already put off.
When my napping habits began to interfere with my life, I knew that it was time for change. I’m a huge proponent of listening to my body, but that doesn’t mean that I have to sleep upon every slightest urge.
My friends suggested using the library to study, where it’ll be a bit harder to sleep. I’d put off visiting the library because I was intimidated by the idea of navigating a large building and sitting in a room full of other students, but the atmosphere couldn’t be any more relaxing. The library has cubicles with cushioned chair and power outlets for an ultimate, distraction-free study session, as well as dedicated group study rooms.
Another major benefit of using the library is that it is located right across the dining hall and isn’t too far away from most academic buildings. I try to walk for my health, but honestly, when I’m having a super-hectic day I simply can’t deal with back-and-forth trips.
For the past month, I’ve beeb going to the library nearly every day. It’s just more convinient. When I want to stay in my dorm, I utilize the common area, rather than staying in my room where my bed is screaming my name.
Assess your learning style.
When I’m trying to finish an assignment and my brain tells me, nope, it usually indicates a larger pattern. Like I said before, I have a mental disability. It takes me an eternity to transcribe and cite sources, because I get overwhelmed when I have to switch between visual stimuli; I have a hard time focusing on one thing at a time, so I need to break tasks down into nanosized steps. Knowing my limitations informs my studying methods, and gives me an idea of how long I may need to complete a task and recuperate.
In my opinion, such introspection should be encouraged as a healthy habit, not unlike counting your steps or tracking your periods, rather than a regimen prescribed to those with a diagnosis. Obviously, someone like me would be on the edge of the bell curve, but that doesn’t mean that we don’t all learn and think differently.
Diversify your study break activities.
Like many other people, I’m used to heading straight to my iPhone, whenever I need a break from working. As I scroll through social media and shopping sites, I lose track of time, dragging what was supposed to be a ten-minute breather into a solid hour of mindless scrolling.
I’ve been making a list of activities that will help reset my brain, instead of sending it into overdrive. For example, I could engage in activities that help me connect, rather than detach, from my body, like breathing exercises, walking, and even beauty rituals. And I could always try to look through other items on my to-do-list to see if there’s something different and even fun that I could chip away at.
Dig deeper.
A new challenge I encountered upon returning to campus was saying no to social commitments. I began spending more than 2 hours in the dining halls to mingle with friends and staying up past midnight to chat with roommates. I went around asking my friends if they wanted to hang out, when I should have been studying.
As my classes progressed, it became harder and harder to balance my social and academic life. I made myself perpetually available, because I was afraid of what would happen if I didn’t. You know, it’s called reading between the lines: if someone keeps making excuses to decline invitations, they probably don’t like hanging out with you, and if someone accepts invitations but never takes the initiative to hang out, they probably don’t care as much as you do. As someone who needs more alone time than average, I felt like prioritizing my academics would entail losing friends, and being a loner, once again.
I wanted to maintain an active social life (who wouldn’t?), but overcommitting wasn’t the way to go. I just had to find a way to communicate that I’m not quote-unquote “busy,” but like, actually busy.
I like to be concrete when I decline invitations. Rather than ending the sentence with sorry or have fun tho, I do my best to identify other times that I’m available, whether it’s next Tuesday or any Fridays later this week.
Above all, I focus on the quality, rather than quantity, of interactions. I practice active listening, and remind myself to stay present, instead of thinking about what I’m doing next. I want to show up as my fearless, insightful, and sometimes obnoxious self.
At the crux of time management is replacing unhelpful behavior with helpful behavior. I don’t think any of us sabotage ourselves because it’s fun. We do it because it serves some sort of purpose — or we believe it does, when it doesn’t. Either way, the only way out is to go back to ground zero: be radically honest with yourself, ask yourself what you really need, and find a way to make it happen. You deserve what serves you.