As any watcher of the late 90s and early 2000s classic series Sex and the City knows, those four women surely know how to give awful advice. Over the course of six seasons (and two movies), Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte, and Samantha have gone through dozens of dates and boyfriends. Recently binging the series for the first time, I am realizing that most of the advice and actions of the women should not be replicated, but there are a few instances where the girls were actually being mature thirty-something-year-olds. Here are five things we can all take away from the show.
(SPOILER WARNING!!)
1. Never tone yourself down to be submissive to a man.
In season 2, episode 14, Miranda was dating a very domineering lawyer named Kevin that would constantly talk over her and order her around. She found that when they were in bed together, he would boss her around but only then is when she found it attractive. In order to continue having sexual relations, Miranda would allow herself to be bossed around by Kevin, eventually realizing that the relationship wasn’t worth keeping. This is a good lesson that was shown to women everywhere, demonstrating that a woman shouldn’t be treated lesser than, as they are not a man’s servant or maid.
2. Looks mean nothing in the long-run.
Charlotte thought Harry was repulsive and ugly when she first met him as her divorce lawyer in season 5, episode 7, but when she found herself attracted to him, she was confused. He was the complete opposite of guys she would give a chance in previous seasons so she didn’t give him a chance at first. After a while, the two of them proved themselves to be arguably one of the best couples of the show. It shows viewers that looks and appearance don’t mean everything when the connection is that strong. Love isn’t always predictable.
3. Everything happens for a reason.
Again for Charlotte, she married someone that wasn’t right for her but ended up finding her soulmate since he was her divorce lawyer for her first marriage. While she at first saw this as a waste of money and time, she found her soulmate. In season 6, episode 7, Charlotte is upset that she wasted her first wedding with all the grand outfits and gestures on a person like Trey but Carrie helped her realize that if she hadn’t done that, she wouldn’t have met her divorce lawyer that would eventually become her husband. This shows that everything happens for a reason, whether it be for you to learn something, meet someone, or become someone.
4. No matter how strong you are, you can still be vulnerable sometimes.
Samantha’s character has always been confident and powerful in all aspects of her life, often involved with flings and one night stands. In season 4, she found herself falling for a man named Richard, who she was working with at the time. He was attracted to her power and distinction from other women he knew. After dating for a while, she caught him cheating on her and this was one of the only times the audience has seen Samantha be vulnerable. It showed that it was okay to not be invincible and have emotions sometimes. The true power came from her leaving the relationship.
5. Know your worth.
In the final season of the series, Carrie moves to France with Petrovsky, the artist. She realizes that she was being put as a second or third priority when it came to his work or his daughter. She liked the idea of living in Paris with Petrovsky with all of the luxuries and opportunities but was often left behind. Carrie noticed that he wasn’t putting as much effort into the relationship as she was, making her finally break up with him as she understood how she wanted to be treated in a relationship.
6. Maintaining your friendships will mean everything in the end.
While the show has a lot of romantic rollercoaster moments, the four girls have a friendship that many yearn for in their lifetime. There are many examples of this, where the girls are constantly looking out for each other after a breakup, through tough times, and through good times. This has shown women everywhere how valuable genuine friendship can be.