Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
Life

Confidence Versus Believing in Yourself

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at TCNJ chapter.

It is easy for me to admit that I have a tendency to overthink things. I am someone who very much lives in my own head, questioning and processing that absolute life out of all of my thoughts. Of course, this is a daily struggle. I work extremely hard to try not to live out my days this way. It is difficult, but I find that the more I catch myself, the more I am able to work on stopping it before it has even started.

Now, this is not to say that I am not a confident woman. I pride myself in how self-assured I am and have been since I was in high school. I respect myself and have learned to love the things about me that I had not always been so keen on. I do not let societal expectations run my life and do not allow anyone to make me feel inferior without putting up a fight. However, I have found that I am also my worst enemy.

But, things have been pointed out to me, by more than one person, within the past year that really irk me. I catch myself thinking that I cannot do a task or a job only to be told that I’m overthinking it. Friends and colleagues alike have told me that I do not realize my capabilities to their full extent and how much potential I have for success and greatness. And when I have been told this, I have always argued that I am a confident individual who knows what she wants and how to get there. It boggled my mind that people believed that I did not know my potential when I fully believed that I was aware of it.

This past summer, however, I had a revelation. I was working at an ice cream shop when someone asked me to perform a task that I had never done before. Immediately, my mind began to race and I started to overthink the situation — I know I have always had a tendency to do this. After a few minutes, I told my coworkers that I could not do what I was asked and started to walk back to the register, until someone told me to “get out of my head”. I realized there, in that moment, that I had been cheating myself this entire time. Instead of fighting back, I should have been listening.

Confidence is key to many successes in life. I have been told before that I exude confidence but lack certainty, which seemed contradictory to me at first. It’s one thing to be sure of yourself but it is completely different to believe in yourself.

It’s no secret that I am not the only person who makes it a habit to overthink. Sometimes, it is easier to put yourself down than rise to a challenge, no matter the size. But, this is a cowardly way out. And even though it can be very difficult, it will serve you well in the end to raise your head high and have faith.

Go forth with confidence.

Believe that you are powerful.

And you will do great things.

Olivia Grasing is a journalism student who aspires to work in the fashion/lifestyle industry.
Kyra Mackesy graduated The College of New Jersey with a BA in Journalism and Professional Writing and a minor in Criminology in 2019. While at TCNJ, she was an active member of their Her Campus chapter, holding a wide array of positions: President and Campus Correspondent, Editor-in-Chief, Senior Editor, Marketing and Publicity Director, and Social Media Manager. She loved seeing her chapter grow throughout her four years in college, and will remain an active Her Campus Alumni.