Some people miss high school once they’ve graduated. I am not one of those people. As I unwillingly make my way into adulthood, I’m left wondering why I rushed through so much, thinking of all the things I could have done differently. I’m not a regretful person, but I do wish I would have known myself then the way that I know myself now. If I could talk to my stupid self while I was in high school, I think I would start with a violent shake of the shoulders, and then, proceed with these tips:
1. Stop crying over your first heartbreak.
It is not that serious, and I promise you will be okay. You’ll eventually learn how to be by yourself, and it will be the best thing you could do for yourself. Haven’t you heard the saying, “You have to be happy on your own to be able to be truly happy with someone else.”?
2. Stop caring so much about what other people think of you and your choices.
The truth is, nobody really cares what you’re doing, posting or saying. Twitter does not make you “cool,” and as a matter of fact, it will only get you into trouble. Hiding behind the internet to create the person you think you want to be is not the way to get anything done.
3. Stop arguing with your parents.
Those are your only real friends, the only people that are going to love you unconditionally. They are of serious value to you and your future, so stop treating them like crap. Their friendship with you is the most important one you will ever have.
4. LEARN HOW TO STUDY.
Seriously. Learn how to study. I am now a 21-year-old college student who is physically incapable of studying. I am paying for it every day. You can’t blow off your work forever, so start practicing how to manage time and how to actually learn in your own way now. Now. I mean it.
5. Go to the football games.
Even though we (still) have the longest losing streak I have ever heard of back at my high school, not supporting the school and its events only causes you to miss out on valuable memories.
6. Stop waxing your eyebrows!!!
Eventually, they’re not going to grow back. You’re going to regret it when you need them to complete your face. After all, eyebrows are said to be “the nipples of the face,” as in The House Bunny.
7. DO NOT get that tattoo.
If you’re looking up tattoos on Pinterest, stop. You do not need a tattoo. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. Be original, come up with something meaningful, and think about it for a year before you do it. Yes, a whole year.
8. Think before you post.
Does anybody actually care? No, they don’t care that you can eat an entire sleeve of Oreos in 20 minutes. No, they don’t care that you ended up drunk, passed out in a field somewhere. You know who might care, though? Your future employer.
9. Are you seriously still crying over a boy?
Move on.
10. Live a little.
If you want to do it, just do it. Don’t be scared to try new things. Don’t make choices for other people. Do NOT complain about regretting what you missed out on. You had your chances, and you didn’t take them. That’s no one’s fault but your own.