After long anticipation due to the first year of grad school being on Zoom, I made it through a year of actual in-person classes and extracurriculars. Being on Zoom made me yearn for social interaction in person, especially since I was a first-year graduate student last year, meaning I hardly knew anyone here after moving from Florida. When classes moved in person this past fall, I was excited because I would actually get to see people regularly.
When the fall semester started, I was excited but wary. COVID wasn’t completely gone, and new variants heightened my anxiety about being in person. It was really nice to be in in-person classes because I got to meet more grad students. The main grad students I met before were through research, and, even then, that wasn’t a lot of students. I am an extroverted introvert, so I gain some of my energy from seeing other people, and going back in person really helped. Also, being in-person helped me with my performance as being on Zoom was very distracting. Having in-person classes started giving me the energy and motivation I missed before.
Despite best efforts, being in extracurricular activities on Zoom could not match with actually meeting in person. There’s a disconnect that forms during club meetings on Zoom. For example, I didn’t really get to know any of my fellow Her Campus TAMU chapter members through Zoom because we weren’t actually near each other. It was easy to listen and have your mic on mute and not interact with people, but again I’m a loud person, so I definitely talked a lot. Seeing HC TAMU members in person for the first time really invigorated me because I started to feel connected with this group. When I graduated undergrad, I was with my old HC UFL chapter for a long time. I was used to seeing them often for meetings and events, and the transition to Zoom while also joining a new chapter was really daunting. With in-person events, I actually felt like a part of this org, though the convenience of doing my meetings anywhere I wanted to with Zoom was really nice.
The thing is, this return to in-person activities made me realize how awkward I am with interacting with people. I became really used to not having to interact with many people, so I didn’t feel the need to repress my quirks or act a certain way around people that aren’t considered normal (I can be a very unique person at times). It was becoming exhausting this past year to actively not be awkward. There were many times I had to apologize for not knowing how to handle social situations without being a nuisance. Thankfully people were accommodating to me despite my quirkiness.
What kind of bummed me out with this return to normalcy is that I lost so much time due to traveling. It was really nice going to class in my office and immediately after doing research in the lab. Saving time commuting is desirable no matter what. My research takes place far away from where my classes are, so commuting by bus across campus really eats into my day. I just felt more productive in my research when I didn’t have to worry about going in person to class, and that’s not an exaggeration. While I’m making progress in my research, it just felt more substantial last year.
The transition back to in-person after being on Zoom exposed which areas of my grad school experience have been lacking. As an example, I never got a real orientation at the beginning of grad school. Sure, they did a virtual one, but it didn’t feel as fulfilling as what a live one would have been. I’m still adjusting to grad school, especially in terms of being social. It’s been hard for me to make friends, but I’m making progress. I’m really growing into my shell, and hopefully, next year is better. This article serves me at least as a reflection of my transition back to “normalcy,” and I feel like I share common sentiments with other people