I am happy to say that I am dating my best friend and I have never been more content with my life! Going back to school and leaving him home has definitely been tough on my mind but we are navigating through it so well I had to write about it.
Now, backstory. My very first relationship I had to do long-distance… typical fresh out of high school going away to college story. Didn’t work out (thank God!) for the dumbest reasons and ever since then I have been scared to even tackle long-distance again. I mean, can you blame me?
Over my time being single, I was able to pinpoint flaws on both ends of my last relationship and what I need to fix in order to make another one actually work. I think that time to reflect always helps and lets you determine what you want versus what you do not want in any other relationship in your future.
My boyfriend (his name is Nick hehe), is such a rock right now in my life and is navigating long-distance with me so strongly (and effortlessly), I am truly grateful for him. I think that this is said so often, but communication really is KEY. Nick has made such an amazing effort in talking to me, telling me he’s at work so I know he won’t respond much, calling me, face-timing me. Now you see, these are things that are probably assured amongst all relationships. I think you’d be surprised to see how many people actually communicate or not… it’s shocking. From my past relationship to this amazing one now I have realized a lot of how people just don’t know HOW to communicate. It’s also a sense of maturity too. Like how bad can it be to just say something and be honest with your significant other?? Anyway rant over. Communicate. Talk about how you want to communicate.
Figure out when you can still have special moments and memories. Value those moments. Nick visited me for my 21st birthday and it was the most special time ever. I didn’t have a big party I dreamed of for obvious reasons but he made it so special to me. It’s important to put effort into those little moments and find those moments too, because at the end of the day those moments are what I remember and make me happiest.
Give each other space. I believe that this has helped too. Sometimes during the day I kind of stay away from my phone to do work or to just get a break and (I tell him so first) but it also is just a mutual agreement that we both need some space, it’s not against you, I just need some time for myself with myself. And there is nothing wrong with that!
I am not saying that my relationship is perfect, but it sure seems like it at times with the way we navigate long-distance. I believe that that is what makes relationships beautiful and even scary at the same time. I was so fearful to get into this again, but letting that fear go and putting the effort on both ends has truly helped so far this semester! I am honestly enjoying this journey (even the minor bumps) and everything I am learning about myself and my boyfriend so far. In my opinion, long-distance is totally do-able if you figure out what works and what doesn’t work with each other, and really work to find that balance that you are happiest with.