Long-Distance Friendships in College: Challenges and Tips

Going to college is hard. Leaving the comfort of your hometown, family, and friends is even harder. That’s why it’s so important to stay connected with your long-distance friendships. The summer before school, you’re always hanging out with your friends, getting closer every day, and then suddenly, you stop seeing them. It’s completely normal to feel less connected when your new life begins because everyone gets busy trying to make new friends and figure out their lives. Here are some tips on staying connected with your hometown friends, so you all continue to feel like a part of each other’s lives.

1. Showing your interest
   1. When things get busier at college, it’s understandable if you can’t talk to your hometown friends all the time. But if a friend is making the effort to reach out to you, make sure to reciprocate. Let them know they’re still important to you. Swipe up on their private stories, FaceTime them, and show excitement for their new experiences—even if you don’t know their new friends, express interest in meeting them. Big group chats staying active is seriously the best way to stay connected. Sending TikToks, memories, and group FaceTimes about your life is so important. Your enthusiasm shows that you care about their life, even from a distance.
   2. If you know your friend is going through a tough time wherever they are, make sure to be there for them. If your friend is constantly trying to reach out to you and you notice that, make sure you are giving them your time so they know how important they are to you. 
2. The Future
   1. During FaceTimes or even quick texts and calls, get excited about your future meetups. Plan when you’ll see each other next—this is a great way to stay connected and remind yourselves why your hometown friends are so special. College breaks come around faster and more often than you might think, so enjoy the anticipation!
   2. When you are home, make sure you understand you may not have a lot of time with them, so make the most of it. It may feel weird that now you all have two lives, one at home, and one at school, but it is seriously the best feeling going back home and debriefing the past few months of your lives. 
   3. Introduce them to your college friends. The best decision I have ever made was inviting my home friends to visit me at SU, and inviting my college friends to my hometown. Not only did it help with getting more involved in each other’s “separate” lives, but now I can confidently say my freshman-year roommate is now best friends with some of my high school friends!
3. Recognize the Change
   1. It’s hard to maintain daily interaction when life is busy. It’s completely normal to go days, even weeks, without FaceTiming or texting—and that’s okay.
   2. It’s ok to feel less close with your home friends while you are making new experiences without them. Going from seeing them every day to once every couple of months is a drastic change, but that doesn’t have to mean you are any less close than before.
   3. Also, it’s okay to feel a bit of FOMO (fear of missing out) when you see your hometown friends making new connections. But don’t forget that you can find new friendships and experiences, too. At Syracuse, there are countless opportunities to get involved. If it seems like your friends at other schools are making connections faster than you, don’t worry, there are so many ways to meet new people here at SU. Check out this article Top 5 MUST-HAVE Advice for Syracuse Freshmen. Trust me, all of your best college memories with your future besties are all ahead of you. 

In the end, the true test of a real friendship is if you can go months without talking, and coming back and feeling like you never left. Trust me, sometimes I’m bad at reaching out to my friends, but I know that Thanksgiving Eve will leave me with great stories my best friends and I will talk about for years to come.