In July of this past summer, I lost my best friend, my biggest supporter, and the most caring woman I’ve ever known: my grandmother. Here is a list of the top five things that I learned from her, in no particular order.
Always find the good in everyone
My grandma seriously never said anything negative about anyone. Ever. Even if someone made it so hard for her to say something good about them, kind words would always come out of her mouth. I’ll never understand how she managed to always say something positive, but I think that everyone, including myself, should follow her example.
Always be willing to give to others
My grandma carried three important things in her purse at all times; tissues, toothpicks, and gum. I could always count on her to have them when I needed them. The day that I realized it was so much more than just her being prepared was the day she casually mentioned to me that she doesn’t even chew gum anymore. This wonderful woman was carrying around gum for her family and friends, and always restocked if she ran out. She cared so much about giving to others that she carried gum around everywhere she went in case someone asked for some, and I honestly think that depicts who she was perfectly.
Open your home whenever you can
My grandma’s home had guests constantly coming in and out. She would never hesitate to invite people over, and she always welcomed her family. She absolutely loved to host Thanksgiving dinners, 4th of July barbeques, and pool parties. Even though it stressed her out immensely, having family and friends around made it all worth it for her. She never made anyone feel unwelcome in her home. She would let me and my friends sleep over, and never failed to make us bacon and eggs when we woke up in the morning. My friends were always treated as if they were family in her home. She truly made me feel at home every time I stepped in the door, and I am so grateful for that.
Spread love and kindness wherever you go
I’ve genuinely never met someone as kind, caring, and loving as my grandmother. She made sure to be kind to everyone and spread as much love as she could. Everybody that she came in contact with knows that she cared so deeply about her family and friends, and rarely ever complained about anything. She treated people with so much respect, and never failed to make me smile. Since I was a little girl, she sat next to me every time we went to dinner together because she knew it would make me happy (even if dinner was at a seafood place that night which meant she had to crack open my crab legs for me). She only ever wanted to make people happy and that is such an excellent way to live.
Strength is truly something you choose
At my sweet 16 party, I did the traditional candle ceremony of lighting 16 candles, dedicating each one to people who are important to you. Typically, the birthday girl will read a speech for this person or group of people, and then ask them to come help her light that candle. Usually, they also walk up to a song the birthday girl chose for them. The song I chose for my grandparent’s candle was I Learned From You by Miley Cyrus. This song captivated the way I felt about them at the time; that they had taught me so much more than I could have ever asked for. However, as my grandma started to get sick, the lyrics of this song started to mean something more specific to me. My grandmother was so strong through everything she went through, rarely complaining and fighting as hard as she knew how. The line in the song, “I learned that strength is something you choose,” seriously stood out to me. My grandmother was very sick, often feeling very physically weak, but she was so incredibly strong. She chose strength during everything she went through, and that is so, so admirable.
My grandmother was one of the best people in my life, and I am forever grateful to be able to love her and to have had the opportunity to be loved by her. Grandma, thank you so much for all that you have taught me. I hope that one day we will meet again, but until then, I’ll be missing you.