Saying no can be difficult for most women. Most individuals agree to do things they don’t want to do, but do them anyway to feel less guilty. The three main struggles that make saying no difficult are people pleasing, fearing disappointing others, and fear of missing out (FOMO). Saying yes too often can lead to the pressure of always being there for others, leaving you extremely exhausted. It gets to a point where you are spreading yourself very thin trying to please everyone. I have had to remind myself that saying no does not have to be difficult, it is not considered selfish, it is necessary. Learning to take care of your well-being is essential. You must stop adding extra loads to your plate, especially if your plate is already full of challenges. Setting boundaries and understanding your limits can empower you to make choices that align with your well-being and personal growth. Recognizing these struggles, we can learn to say no and prioritize ourselves without guilt.
“PEOPLE PELASING”
Being a people pleaser is something I struggle with often. Many women believe that being kind means always saying yes. You can be kind and say no. If you do not want to participate in something, it causes no harm to say no. Sometimes you must look back and see how you always go out of your way to make others happy. From my own experiences, I have noticed that others expect you to constantly be availabile all the time. It is very draining, but I try to push through to help. Over time, I learned you must set boundaries; you cannot get through life as a people pleaser.
“FEARING DISAPPOINTING OTHERS”
Many women including family, friends, and coworkers feel responsible for making people happy. We worry that saying no will make us seem rude. Fear often leads to taking on more than you can handle and neglecting your own needs. Disappointing someone by saying no does not mean you are a bad person. People who genuinely care about you will respect your answer.
“FOMO (FEAR OF MISSING OUT )”
FOMO is the fear of missing out. This is a major reason many women struggle to say no. In college, there are a many parties, sporting events, and other extracurricular activities. If you feel tired and don’t want to go out or party, you can say no, do not let your friends peer pressure you into doing something you are not willing to do. Try shifting your mind to the joy of missing out. Missing one event will not change your life forever, learn how to focus on what truly matters and that is you.