Freshman year taught me a lot. Lessons on branching out, learning about myself and most importantly: friendship. My first day at Stockton, I found myself in a state of mind/emotion that I never thought possible – shy. I didn’t know a soul and felt so out of place in South Jersey. I was freaking out. I had no clue what was wrong with me. I prayed, but it began to sound like repetitive lyrics because I wasn’t confident. I was so scared to leave my room. Me, of all people. The girl who basically ran to school with bags of luggage. I was waiting for it all to hit me – I was in college. Where were the streamers and confetti? So there’s a lot of things they don’t tell you about college and I’m going to tell you the five things the stuck out to me the most.
1. Snapping your fingers will not make friends magically appear in your life.
I know, shocking. You have to try! The first step is acceptance and that I did. Once I realized that the only way to get comfortable was to let my guard down and make friends, I was perfectly fine.
Join clubs and be active on campus. Yes, your RA and orientation leader probably told you the same thing, but it’s true. You won’t find your group of people if you don’t try to take a chance and put yourself out there.
2. Having a huge group of friends is not always a great idea.
Makes you feel pretty popular doesn’t it? You’ll have all these friends and new memories, but having a huge group to hang out with might give a false sense of security.
Personally, I ended up having a “this” friend and a “that” friend, people for occasions instead of actual relationships. Slowly the weight was too much. It was overwhelming trusting people for the side they decided to show you. True colors began to show and I started to distance myself from the drama.
3. College doesn’t wipe away high school mentalities.
If your guidance counselor tries to cure your senioritis by saying “the people in college are mature”- understand there’s a catch. Sure, “technically” you’ll meet people much older than you, but does not mean they’ll behave that way.
Grow at your own speed and see the differences between who you are and the people around you.
4. It’s okay to be homesick!
This won’t make you a wimp or show that you’re not independent. You left a daily routine/schedule that you had for years behind; it’s okay to miss that and the people too.
A remedy for homesickness could be to remember where you came from by the company you keep. Sometimes you have to keep in mind, “Would I be friends with you if I was back home? It’s important to step out of your comfort zone but never compromise who you are or add unnecessary drama in your life. It isn’t worth it, especially in such an important stage of your life.
5. Freshman Fifteen: true or false?
It honestly depends on various factors: stress, Netflix binging, inactivity, alcohol (haha) etc. Sometimes you won’t even be aware that you’re reaching for a slice a pizza and suddenly it’s gone.
No munchie shaming! Eat what you want, but take care of yourself and be aware of the consequences of certain eating habits. Everyone is so worried about gaining a couple pounds instead of negative influences. You also have to be able to remain true to yourself and that is the only way to steer clear of the extra carbs.
Bonus Tip: Accepting changes shows that you’re evolving. Wasn’t the whole point of graduating high school to take a step forward into the real world? Keep pushing and motivate yourself too.