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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Stetson chapter.

What really is the definition of a date in this generation?

Every girl has an idea of what her dream date will look like. They are typically crafted straight from her favorite romantic comedy and planned out meticulously from what outfit she would wear to what time she expects her date to take her for a walk on the beach.  This used to be an attainable dream, but for this generation, traditional dating is a thing of the past. We have forgotten the basis behind starting a meaningful relationship. Back in our parent’s day when you found someone attractive and wanted to get to know them you would ask them on a date, not to “Netflix & chill.” Dating used to be the first step in getting to know someone, but it has become almost obsolete.

I believe there are two main reasons for this: the fear of commitment and the expectations that arise from social media.

On many college campuses, Stetson especially, people find it almost taboo to have emotions for just one person. This opens the door to unhealthy FWB relationships and allows people to receive the good parts of a relationship without the “headaches.” Usually in the beginning of a friends with benefits relationship, there is some sort of agreement where both parties agree not to become emotionally invested. Sounds easy enough, right? Wrong! Many fail to realize that at some point, one or both of the parties WILL deveop feelings. It’s inevitable. You cannot be intimately involved with someone for an extended period of time and not feel anything for them. In these instances, it tends to become a competition to see who can stay the most emotionally detached the longest or who can avoid admitting the truth. These pseudo relationships force the mentality that emotions are synonymous with ending things. If someone believes that showing emotion will be a negative, their fear to actually pursue a possible love interest by dating becomes even greater.

Our daily life is dominated by social media. Young adults clutch their phones to their chest and use social media as this bible. The information and images viewed on sites like Twitter, Snapchat and Instagram portray an unrealistic image of relationships. Social media is flooded with pictures that depict how an ideal first date should go — these are the same pictures many girls retweet and caption with #goals. These posts set unrealistic expectations of the dating world. No college guy can afford to take you on a plane to France to try an authentic croissant for your first date. I would imagine that these post deter possible suitors. If guys and girls think that their crush wants some expensive and elaborate date that they cannot possibly afford their reaction will probably be…

A date should not be defined by social media. The purpose of a date isn’t to be flashy and expensive; though that is nice, the true purpose is to get to know your date. Dating is way to get to know another human being and discover if there are any emotional and physical attraction, without the added pressures.