Speaking confidently can be difficult. In today’s society much of what we say is said with the hope that it will be accepted and agreed with. We place so much of our own identity into our words that self doubt has almost become normal. For me, I am guilty of using all of the following phrases regularly, whether it is in class discussion, when speaking with a professor, or even just when socializing, and I feel I am not alone. But why?
We should be ourselves and speak confidently! We should be using our words as a way to be assertive in our ideas and beliefs and as a way to always be honest. So, I am going to focus on avoiding these phrases, what about you?
“I kinda …” – Either you agree or disagree, say what you mean!
“…I guess” – If you had enough of an idea to say it aloud then you had an opinion and that’s awesome. Don’t throw away your authority by ending a sentence with these two words.
“Maybe” – If it is the answer to a question where you’re truly unsure yet, this word is okay to use. But, if you’re sharing your opinion, throwing this in the middle is simply implying that you’re not really confident in what you’re sharing. Be confident!
“I wonder” – I am guilty of using this at the beginning of many of my sentences during class discussion. The reason I struggle with it now? Because I am never actually wondering about the content we are discussing. If something is unclear and a question is in order, why do I struggle to ask a direct question.
“Sort of” – A comparison does not mean that two things of sort of similar. You are comparing two things because you know inside that the two things are compatible. Remember that you know what you are trying to say, so say it as directly as possible!
“Like” – This word to me is a symbol of doubt. Sometimes, if the context is right, it is necessary to use. Just be mindful every time you use it!
“Don’t you think?” – Ending your statement with a question is like asking your audience to approve your statement in order for the ideas in it to become validated. But we don’t always have to all agree! We often accomplish more when we don’t.
Photos: Professional Planner, Galit Breen on She Knows, Olga Libich