Picture this: you’re a young, elementary school-aged child. Almost every day, you get to go to school where you get to see your friends every single day. At every free moment, you are all playing together, whether it be in class or at recess. After school, your parents allow you to play in the playground for a while. Once in a while, your parents arrange for you and your friends to have a playdate. Everything is perfect, and you’re able to remain close. Fast forward to the present, where this isn’t the case.
Today, when you think of your friendships, they may seem drier than they used to be. There isn’t any more carefree play. Your parents don’t arrange playdates for you either. When you talk with your friends, you probably aren’t discussing the hottest new toy anymore. Your conversations are probably filled with your stresses, your classes, your future, and your career.
It may also be harder to keep up with your friendships now. Back in the day, you were able to see your friends all day in class or at recess. Having your friends present in your day-to-day life was the norm. Bonds were strengthened because of this. Now that everyone is in college, chances are you may not see your friends every day. They may be in different classes, majors, or even states at this point in life. You no longer have your parents arranging your playdates. The torch has now been passed to you, making you the one responsible for keeping in touch with your friends. Unfortunately, this is harder for some than one might think.
With the rise in technology, some might think it would be easier to keep in touch, but to the surprise of many, technology happens to be a big divider in friendships. Instead of keeping in touch with your friends, you might just leave a like and comment on their Instagram posts. You may feel that you’ve been updated on their life, reached out and that’s more than enough. Even when spending time with your friends in person, technology acts as a divider. Many people subconsciously check their phones and reply to texts, emails and other notifications instead of giving their friends their full attention. Sometimes friends will doomscroll in each other’s presence as well, assuming that being in the same room is building a strong bond.
Instead of allowing technology to slowly divide you and your friends, try to let it be the thing that helps unite you. Reach out to old friends and continue to keep in constant touch with your close circle. Now that you’re the adult planning the “playdates,” you need to keep up. Invite your friends to events and outings, even if they’re spontaneous. Take a few minutes and shoot them a text or call, asking about their recent life updates and checking in.
In reality, it doesn’t take much to remain close with your friends like you were back in the day. All one truly needs to do is make an effort. Personally, reaching out and blocking out distractions during hangouts are the perfect ways to make your loved ones feel special.