Freshman year of college didn’t go as planned. The transition was a lot harder than I expected and prepared for, which took a huge toll on me. The workload and classes were more challenging than I was used to, I struggled for months finding friends and it was my first time moving away. I was experiencing a lot of firsts: including my first time being a freshman. Just four years ago, I was concluding my freshman year of high school. However, unlike this time around, it was entirely online due to the COVID-19 pandemic. During that year, I threw myself into every activity, every club and every opportunity that I could. I wasn’t going to let “some virus” stop me from being the best version of myself that I could be. And I didn’t, but I also didn’t realize that the world that I was living in 2020/21 was not what real life was going to be like forever. So, although I adjusted well to a new school, and new environment, that rough patch that people usually go through during the transition wasn’t there. A lot of aspects about what freshmen year should’ve been like weren’t there. So this goes around, the struggles that I should’ve already experienced like socializing with new people, a higher level of education, and more, I didn’t know how to deal with because in all honesty, this was my first true time dealing with these issues. And I took it so much rougher than I thought I would. My impression of moving away for college was that I was ready to be on my own. My sister moved out when I was around 9 or 10 years old, so I’ve been the only child at home for a long time and I thought that this wouldn’t be a big transition. I was wrong. When you move away, you quickly realize how dependent you truly are on your parents and how much they do for you that you don’t even realize sometimes. Not only having to adjust to doing everything on my own, I felt very alone. I expected when I moved that everyone at college would be very outgoing and want to make friends just as eagerly as I did because we were all in the same boat. I was very wrong. I didn’t realize it until I got here, but St. John’s is a commuter-heavy school. That means two things: first, friends you do make will be going home everyday and every weekend so you will only see them for class for the most part. Secondly, if they live close enough to commute, so do all their friends from high school. Everyone seemed to already know each other here and weren’t looking for new additions to their lives and because of that, and because I still wasn’t used to all these new people, it took me a very long time to make friends. Luckily, I moved here with my best friend, so I had her, but other than her, I wouldn’t say I made a new friend until January (second semester). Being an extrovert, not having friends and people in my life really took a shot at my happiness and my confidence, which made the transition even more difficult. Lastly, the level of education and heavy workload was far from what I expected. Throughout high school, I had always excelled when I tried. If I wanted to, I would typically always get over a 3.75 GPA each quarter, and was involved in way more than I should’ve been in. Yet, college courses were giving me a run for my money. I really did want to go above and beyond for the work and education I was getting, but I learned that I have limits and can’t overwork myself. Learning to do what needs to get done instead of what more I can do was a change I needed to make or else I was going to burn out (and go crazy).Â
     Overall, I am very proud of where I have come this past year. I have experienced a lot of firsts these last several months, but those firsts helped me develop myself and adjust to the beginning of adulthood. So, although it was difficult, I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I overcame a lot this year, experienced so much, yet found beauty in it all and now truly love college and everything it has to offer. To late movie nights, joining clubs, pulling all-night study sessions, to meeting people from around the world, there has been nothing like college that I have ever experienced before. So, for anyone struggling in their first year, just keep going and appreciate all the little things that keep the days going, because there’s always a new day to begin.