Do you ever wonder how some girls wake up every day as a clean girl? The secret is, they probably aren’t that clean. We all know the feeling when you wake up less like a baddie and more like you’ve had a bad night’s sleep. I certainly do! I wake up late without time for my hair wash day, or I feel more like rising and crying than rising and shining. But I also know well the joy of my home girl hack – the dirty girl’s clean girl look. A savior for those who simply cannot be bothered but want to look good against all odds.
Clean Girl Hair
First of all, God’s greatest gift to our current generation… the slick back. This is a magical tool, but its power is not to be abused; due to its increasing usage, it’s not the great disguise we once thought it was. The trick to keeping this dirty girl look clean is not in the “slick”, but it’s in the “back”. So long as you slick it with your favorite gel, brush or Slick Stick, the gift is the party in the back. Don’t let your greasy pony stop you from letting your mane shine! Whip out a messy updo, a spikey bun, a ballet twist, a sporty-spice braid, or my personal favorite – an overnight curly girlie pony! Trick them into thinking you’re just slicking it back for fun (not because you’re a dirty dog).
clean girl Make-up
Make-up is one of the easiest steps. “Stick to the stuff you know” ~ High School Musical. All you need to do is add a little bit of highlighter and make that shimmer outshine the bags under your eyes or the new pimple that has popped up overnight. Let that fresh dewy gleam match the slicked-back glow coming from your glossy (greasy) hair. The only other step is to make sure your mascara says “I slept a full 8 hours!” not “I slept in this makeup all night!”. And when in doubt, wear no makeup other than your confidence — you’re such a baddie they won’t even notice. Plus, if your undereyes aren’t looking so bright, you can still look on the bright side – Marie Claire’s beauty director is adamant that eye bags are the next beauty statement!
CLEAN GIRL OUTFIT
My greatest discovery in being a clean-girl is that anything and everything can become a clean-girl fit if you deck it out with hair and jewelry. Obviously, in an ideal world, you would be dressed in something cool and a little sexy, something uncomfortable but worth it. But girliepop, in an ideal world, you wouldn’t have woken up feeling that pounding in your head or that dread of leaving your bed. My advice on clothing – take the bed with you. On a dirty girl day, anything goes. The clean girl look is such a brilliant disguise that each athleisure, sweatsuit, or glorified pajama fit can look like the greatest ensemble if you dress it up right. Your face and hair already look so good that no one will question why you left the house with your trousers on back to front. And if you feel up to it, try out a classic St Andrews Aesthetic outfit, but let’s not be overconfident; keep that hoodie close by.
CLEAN GIRL JEWELRY
Aside from the baller bouffant hair you’re already rocking, this is the greatest accessory. Wear your jewelry and wear a lot of it. The only thing outshining your greasy gleam is the glimmer of your golden gems. The ideal jewelry stack should include many rings, but on the days you just look too good, make sure to leave that ring finger free. Earrings should be big and bold – remember what they say – the bigger the hoop, the bigger the baddie. Something like Spoiled Life’s Triple Entwine Hoops or their unique Tyger by the Tail ones! And as for necklaces and bracelets, drip yourself out with ice on your wrists.
CLEAN GIRL ATTITUDE
The main thing you need to know is that being a clean girl isn’t about how clean you actually feel (or are), it’s about making people believe in your mirage. You are the cleanest girl in town as far as they’re concerned. The clean girl aesthetic is all about acting non-chalant when someone asks you why you always look so put together and walking around with the confidence of a girl who just freshly washed her hair. Whether you leave your house with your shoes on the wrong feet or maybe forgot to put on your deodorant in the morning, you must act like it was absolutely incontestably on purpose and the world will believe you. (But please do remember that deodorant…)
So the next time you wake up on the wrong side of the bed – or in someone else’s bed entirely – make sure you remember that you don’t need to be a clean girl to look like one. With a little bit of shimmer, shine, and a whole lot of bling, you could look so clean you’ll be every dirty girl’s dream.