Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
/ Unsplash

20 Things You Learn About Men in College

1.     Not every guy is “the one”. Don’t expect that from every guy you date, and instead of being hurt every time, you’ll be pleasantly surprised when “the one” actually comes along!

2.     Your boyfriend should be your best friend, but he should not be your ONLY friend. Don’t leave your girlfriends in the dust, because they’re there for the long haul, even after he leaves. 

3.     Avoid the guys who call themselves “nice guys”. They’re usually not that nice.

4.     If he cheats on you, leave his stupid ass. That is one lapse in judgment that should not be forgiven. Even if he says he was drunk, or stoned, or it didn’t mean anything, or she didn’t mean anything, he still made that choice. He knew it would hurt you and he chose to do it anyway, and there is absolutely no way you should stay with someone who disregards your feelings in that way.

5.     Don’t expect him to pay! As a general rule, in the new age, whoever asks for the date should pay for it. Or you can at least offer, and if he insists on paying then yay! But it’s silly to expect him to pay for everything all the time, and not fair to his wallet. Share the costs and things will feel much more equal in the long run.

6.     If he says “You owe me (sex, drugs, money, time) because I (paid, did this/that)”, RUN. He’s manipulating you, and this is an early sign of an abusive relationship. You should not feel like you owe him something just because he did you a favor or did something nice for you.

7.     Guys who talk shit about girls who have lots of hookups are the wooooorst. You can bet he’s patting his friends on the backs for sleeping around. You don’t need that kind of a double standard in your life.

8.     And speaking of hookups: don’t be ashamed of them, girl. It’s fun! Be safe, careful, and clear in your intentions, and it’ll all be good. Don’t let society and douchey dudes shame you into thinking you can only have one, either. Your body, your choice.

9.     Also, don’t be shamed into thinking you need to date a man for a certain amount of time before sleeping with him. There’s no shame in sleeping with a guy before entering a relationship. However, if you sleep with him without communicating your desire for a relationship, don’t be surprised when he assumes it was just a hookup. If you say you want a relationship and he suddenly doesn’t want to have sex, then be happy, because you just saved yourself a lot of time and hearbreak. But waiting for sex doesn’t necessarily make it any better or worse, so if you want it, go for it!

10. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking he HAS to say “I love you” first. If it’s how you truly feel, and you think your relationship is heading in a good direction, be transparent about your feelings. He’ll appreciate your honesty and it’ll take pressure off of him.

11. Keep your priorities straight when in a relationship. It’s ok to make sacrifices for someone you’re serious about, but you shouldn’t be the only one making sacrifices. Don’t let your guy be your entire world; stay focused on your goals and passions.

12. Don’t worry about looking perfect around your guy all the freaking time. Guys actually do enjoy seeing us in our natural habitat, down to the ratty sweats without makeup, chowing down on pizza and junk food. It’s not always the easiest thing in the world, but you’ll be letting him into your own little world and that will bring you two closer.

13. Don’t rely on a guy for everything. It can suck being alone, but it’s also important to learn to be your own best friend.

14. Most guys don’t care about all the little flaws you see in the mirror every day. He doesn’t care about how your stomach rolls up during sex. In fact, he probably doesn’t even notice. So just enjoy yourself and don’t worry!

15. Guys generally aren’t great with expressing themselves. Accept it, and you’ll be much happier in the long run.

16. Let him be his own person. You are two different people, so act like it.

17. Jealousy is natural. Trust issues are natural, especially if you’ve been cheated on or had bad relationships. Remember to communicate and all will be well.

18. On that note, guys are not good at guessing your feelings. COMMUNICATE THEM. Don’t say that you’re fine if there’s something on your mind. Guys who don’t respond well to talking about your relationship simply are not mature.

19. Exes are exes for a reason. Remember this when you’re alone and drunk on Saturday night and he pops up on your Facebook feed. Drunk dialing is not your friend, phone a friend instead.

20. Good guys are out there. Eventually you’ll find a man who understands all your little quirks and habits, and loves you despite how weird you think you are. Keep your heart open to new experiences. Even if it doesn’t work out, you’ll have fun and learn new things along the way. And if it does work out, even better!

I'm Suzie, and I'm a senior at Sonoma State University! I'm a Peer Mentor, a member of SSU's Equestrian team, cat lover, tea drinker, avid book reader. I'm an anthropology major pursuing a career in higher education and student affairs as an advocate for student programs with a focus on diversity, mental health, and sexual assault awareness. I'm excited to gain experience learning about and raising awareness of current campus issues through writing for HerCampus!
Similar Reads👯‍♀️