If you saw me on the Saturday of Halloween weekend, you would have seen a tall girl in a short dress with a plunging neckline, push-up bra, heeled booties, and partying like it’s 1999.
What you don’t see is that I have a 3.9 GPA, hold campus leadership positions, sit on the boards of three student organizations, do research for my academic department, volunteer with middle schoolers, and am a damn good person.
Now, back to Halloween night. Based on this three second snapshot, you might have categorized me as a slut. You might have made assumptions about my ethics, my sexuality, my promiscuity, and my values. And regardless of the accuracy, or lack thereof, of these accusations: You would have absolutely no right to.
This doesn’t just apply to Halloween, either. The term “slut” has no place in our vocabulary, now or ever. For one, it is an outdated term. According to The Bolde, the term originated in reference to “a woman with low standards of cleanliness” – a far cry from what it is now used for.
The term’s evolving meaning has produced a phenomenon commonly referred to as “slut-shaming”. This involves deciding that a woman is inferior, guilty of something immoral, out of control and worthy of being degraded and labeled as a “whore”, all because of her perceived sexual expression.
Notice how even the original definition specifically refers to a woman. This is because slut-shaming is sexist, with boys and men being congratulated for the same behavior girls and women are shamed for. As an article on slut-shaming by the Huffington Post commented, “This is the essense of the sexual double standard: Boys will be boys, and girls will be sluts.”
It is also extremely misleading in the context of what we value as a society. The media reveals a lot of insight into our society’s beauty standards: Tan, skinny with the right kind of curves, long legs, perky boobs, to name a few. We are oversaturated by elements of standardized heterosexual femininity, begged to accept perception as fact. But then if a woman dresses to show off these attributes, she is prone to being categorized as a slut. So the media promotes these images of what women should look like, reflecting what society thinks women should look like, and then we condemn women for conforming to these standards. You lose if you do, you lose if you don’t.
Yet despite all this, it is a term that perpetuates our culture, used on purpose as well as subliminally. Even our potential next president has engaged in numerous seen and documented instances of slut-shaming. In fact, slut-shaming is so ingrained in our vocabulary that I was about to comment on my own lack of promiscuity, but the fact that I feel the need to defend myself when talking about sexual activity is a function of the problem. Slut-shaming and associated terms are so normalized and omnipresent that if I filled a room with young women, I guarantee every single one will account to having faced this at some point in their life thus far.
Now, this isn’t about villainizing everyone who has ever used the word “slut”. Hell, I’ve used it. But if we are going to shift the culture around how we view and treat women, we need to start by looking at our own actions, the actions of the individuals a culture rides on.
So in summary, here is a brief guide on how to not slut shame on Halloween (or ever):
- See an outfit you don’t like for literally any reason? Don’t wear it.
- About to call a girl “slutty” or something similar because of said outfit? Don’t do it.
- Hear your friend violate any of the above? Don’t laugh; call them out on it.
- Literally have any opinion or assumptions regarding another’s sexuality? Remind yourself: It’s none of your business.
It’s that easy.
I hope that you are able to look at this term, and other inherently degrading terms you may use, in a new light. “Slut” has no place in our vocabulary.
Yes, I went out Halloween weekend, and yes, I was wearing a short dress that showed off my curves. And you know what? I had a damn good time, and looked great too.
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