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An Open Letter to My Mom: With Some Help From the Gilmore Girls

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Sonoma chapter.

Dear Mom,

I haven’t even started writing and I’m already tearing up. First and foremost, thank you for giving me life. The older I get and the more I learn about childbirth/motherhood, the more grateful I am for everything you went through to bring me into the world. Even after nine awfully pregnant months and 72-plus hours of labor, you still love me! Incredible. Your love, strength, and the incredibly sweet stories about your experience have inspired me to want to do the same thing one day. (One day in the far future though… Remember my older siblings now before you start calling me about grandkids…) But I’m here today, alive and well, because of all your hard work. Thank you and I love you! 

Mama, you are my mother before all else. When I’m stuck in my dorm sick as a dog, I still call you because your voice is more comforting than the chicken soup on the stove (your recipe of course). When I’m kicking ass at school, acing tests, and rocking it at work, I call you because I want to make you proud and make you feel included in all I do. I wish you could just follow me around school for a week so you could see the amazing things I get to do at college as a student, in my clubs, and a student leader. Without you I would not be here. It was your guidance and acceptance as well as the occasional not so gentle kick in the pants that got me to the place I am today. Thank you, and I love you.

Mama, you are the most beautiful woman I know. Because of you I am confident. You were always proud of your body for its beauty as well as its strength, and you made sure I knew it. You inspired me to be strong like you, to be a woman who can haul her own giant bags of dirt around the garden. You are strong, and beautiful because of it. You taught me self-love and self-care before they were trending as part of the body-positive movement. You taught me to love my thick thighs and big butt before they were popular. You taught me that self-worth comes from inside, not from society’s messages or some dumb boy. And you taught me to take care of myself and to celebrate my beauty as a strong, capable woman. Because of this, I can genuinely smile and say thank you to the people who tell me “Oh you look just like your ma”.

Mama, thank you for dealing with me going through puberty. You handled my boy-craziness with grace and a fair amount of teasing, but that’s ok because it kept me humble. Thank you for standing with my friends and I in solidarity through all the drama, and for sticking with me as I flip-flopped between hating boys and crushing on them. And thank you for making sure I knew it was ok for me to like girls. It doesn’t really apply to me, but thanks anyways. Your open-mindedness was a gift not all girls are blessed with, and I’m glad you passed it down to me. And thank you for your kindness and gentleness; it made growing up a whole lot easier.

Mama, you and I will always fight and disagree over things: my tattoos, my piercings, our political views, what we should eat for dinner, what I should do with my life, which dress is more appropriate for Thanksgiving dinner. But at the end of the day, I wouldn’t want to be having these conversations with anyone else. One of the best parts of having a mom who’s also my best friend is that I can talk to you about anything. I always want your opinions, and I always want to share my thoughts with you. We may not always agree, but I know that we both grow because of it. Thank you for respecting my ideas and not shooting me down just because I’m young and less experienced.

Mama, thank you for being you. Thank you for teaching me about feminism and equality, my generation wouldn’t be so full of feminist badasses without the women of your generation who burned their bras and paved the way. Thank you for teaching me that I am not less than anyone just because of my gender and that I can get the whole damn world on a platter if I work for it. Thank you for teaching me to stand up for myself and take no shit from anyone. You taught me how to swear, too, and I’ll never stop thanking you for that.

You are the best role model I could ever have asked for, because you’re more than a mom. You’re a wife, a daughter, and a sister yourself. You are an incredible homemaker, and even though you retired before I could see you at work in the hospitals, you’re still a kick-ass nurse. Thank you for showing that mothers can choose to stay home, or go to work, and be successful either way.

Thank you for pushing me to always be better, but for cutting me slack when you know I’ve had enough. As much as I love telling you about my life, it’s nice that I don’t have to be on top of everything all the time when I’m with you. I don’t have to be a manager or a coordinator; I can just be your girl. Your love made me the strong, capable, powerful woman I am today and I’m so proud to call you my mom.

Love you with all my heart, to the moon and back,

Your daughter

I'm Suzie, and I'm a senior at Sonoma State University! I'm a Peer Mentor, a member of SSU's Equestrian team, cat lover, tea drinker, avid book reader. I'm an anthropology major pursuing a career in higher education and student affairs as an advocate for student programs with a focus on diversity, mental health, and sexual assault awareness. I'm excited to gain experience learning about and raising awareness of current campus issues through writing for HerCampus!
Carly is one of the CCs for Sonoma State University, and she is majoring in communications and minoring in sociology. She grew up in southern California, and even though she misses the warm beach, she really enjoys living in wine country in northern CA. She has always had a passion for writing and is so grateful that Her Campus allows her to share that love and encourage others to join in the fun.