I don’t want to be seen, I want to be heard and I do not want to just be heard, I want to be understood and I do not want to just be understood, I want to be followed.
Do not look at my long hair or slim body. Do not look at my breasts or hear my high voice. Do not see my soft lips or slim fingers.
I love to read and write, I love to think critically and convey my findings articulately. How can you understand my ideas if you are too distracted by my feminine appearance? I don’t care about how I look, I care about how I think and that’s what I want you to care about too.
Now I may be wrong, but this is my own observational theory: there seems to be a double standard that doesn’t benefit either side. Women who are “attractive” by societal standards are often given the spotlight and position to be heard. They’re listened to, but they’re not understood or taken seriously; their appearance just earns them the attention. Now what’s the point in listening to a lecture without taking any mental notes? The other side of this is that societally deemed “unattractive” women are not given this automatic spotlight and have to work much harder to be heard at all. If what they have to say is actually societally worthy of being heard, it must be pretty good. Very often when society then gets a glimpse at the female author, they tear into the woman for not being good looking.
So which is it better to be really? Just kidding. That’s the wrong question.
Does appearance define the validity of what is being said?
I’ll answer both yes and no.
Yes. I think it is fair that in professional settings, such as school and work, that it is reasonable to ask for a level of professionality with one’s appearance, for both men and women, because neglecting that standard means running the risk of not being taken seriously. As well as the fact that professional attire stands for a sense of shared unity. Some may disagree, but it’s human nature “to look,” for both men and women, when casual skin is exposed.
No. the mouth it comes out of does not change the idea. The mind that thought up the idea is in no way connected to the biological gender. My biological gender had a role to play in how others treated me and what I was surrounded by growing up, which does shape my mind. However, the mind can still manifest anything it desires without an inherent tie with the body.
A writer can write about anything and hide behind the words free of a body. You my dear, don’t even know I am a woman until I tell you. What impact does that make? What if I told you I were a man? In a perfect world, it would change nothing, but we are far from perfect. For men and women both, whether their ideas are traditionally masculine or feminine, let us try and hear them how they are, just ideas.
When I speak, do not hear me as an empowered woman, understand me as an empowered person, and with this voice that you may never hear out loud, see the ideas as they are.
Don’t forget to check out more by the SSU chapter!
The Body Positivity Movement and Its Benefits
My struggle with body positivity
She’s not bossy, she’s a boss: A reflection on double standards