The Bachelor Recap: The Fence Saga

Ladies and gentlemen, the blessed day all of #BachelorNation has been waiting for has finally arrived.

Colton Underwood.

 

Has finally.

 

Jumped The Fence.

And the moment couldn’t have played out more perfectly. Just like the season as a whole, it was an episode that simultaneously spilled all the tea yet was decidedly underwhelming. Let’s review:

 

So, it was kind of clear by Tayshia’s interview following the Fantasy Suite that the date ended in a meh tone. She’s kind of into him, he’s kind of into her…..the relationship is fine, but it’s not stellar.

Then it was time for Cassie and Colton’s date. An amazing day in Portugal filled with dancing (shoutout to the absolutely adorable old couple they danced with!!) and a picnic overlooking the town; it was perfect.

But, it’s The Bachelor. We all know that things couldn’t possibly end as perfect as they started, and the date encountered some major turbulence over the *tiny* matter that Colton did not, in fact, get the blessing for engagement from Cassie’s dad.

Y’all, Cassie was shook.

 

And then before the couple reconvened for dinner, CASSIE’S DAD SHOWED UP IN PORTUGAL. Long story short, they hashed out feelings and Cassie decided she was going to break it off with Colton. This information was of course spliced with footage of COLTON saying that he was in love with Cassie and wanted to be with HER in the end.

Now *I* was shook. This poor guy had no idea what was going to happen.

And then ALL the drama started. When Colton and Cassie sat down to talk, there were tears, confessions of love, and Cassie stating over and over that she was “confused.”

 

The real tea was that Colton said he wouldn’t stop pursuing her even if she left. Mind you, there are still two OTHER girls left in this situation.

Then, basically, she says she “can’t do this,” leaves, he says the same, and the fence is officially #jumped. So, this whole dramatic moment is derived from a case of unrequited love, which tbh seems to be the only kind of love Colton has endured during his time in the Bachelor franchise.

Honestly, the best part of the whole thing is when Chris Harrison asks where’s the button to open the gate because unlike Colton, the former NFL player, he is not about to jump over a fence.

And there you have it, folks. It was truly a beautiful moment, and one I will cherish forever.