Trigger Warning: mentions of disordered eating, sexual assault
Until I started college, I never really considered myself a feminist. In my small town, there were no large-scale injustices that made me think men and women weren’t treated equally. But after being around so many strong-willed women on campus, I realized all of the seemingly normal actions that we encounter every day are simply the result of a tyrannical patriarchy that we conform to.
The first time I came to this realization was when I heard a girl in front of me bragging to her friend about how little she had eaten that day. I didn’t think anything of it at first, because I did the same thing with my friends, until someone pointed out to me the absurdity of bragging about starving yourself. I had never thought about it that way before, but it was the truth. So many of us are just trying to hit that ideal weight, to become the perfect woman, when in reality, we are applauding each other for starving ourselves. That was just the beginning for me; I started to consider what other areas of my life could be toxic, blind acceptance of conforming to a man’s world.
Some things I found were seemingly small, like feeling the need to hide a tampon up your sleeve before going to the bathroom. However, this simple act portrayed that we wanted to ensure men were “comfortable” with something completely normal—and, worse—that we had been trained to be ashamed of a simple biological concept millions of women deal with regularly.
Other things were huge issues I couldn’t believe even needed to be addressed. The most shocking of these was the concept of consent. Someone shared with me that they had been raped. But because she didn’t say no, her friends told her that it wasn’t rape and pushed her trauma to the side. We have been brainwashed into thinking that because we didn’t say no, a man has the right to assume he can treat our bodies like property.
We have the power to change the narrative. We have been neglected, overshadowed and taken for granted. I am tired of being told where my place in this world should be. We are taught to hide what makes us women: never show too much skin, or worse, a bra strap. We have become a joke to the greater male population: “fighting like a girl” or being a “pussy” is a sign of weakness rather than strength. It’s time we step out of the box and embrace imperfection. We are powerful women and no one can tell us who to be.