I have been obsessed with Conan Gray since I was 13. I have liked his music since before his most famous title, “Heather,” was released, which was popularized on TikTok in 2020. He is the one artist whose album drops I have anxiously awaited through all of my teenage years. His discography could be dubbed the soundtrack of my youth.Â
Due to my deep-seated affection, I have seen Gray in concert twice. I witnessed his “Kid Krow Tour” in 2022, my first ever concert, which was a perspective-shifting experience. After hearing him live, my affection for his music only grew. This September, I saw him on his latest tour, “The Wishbone Pajama Show,” this time in a much larger venue, his popularity having grown exponentially over the past three years. His stage presence is unmatched and his appreciation for his fanbase is consistently evident.
Gray’s lyrics are relatable to a wide array of audiences, with intricate, emotional discussions of love, loss and friendship. But his queer identity, often referenced in his songs, adds depth and sorrow for LGBTQ+ fans. As a young teen, I felt as if Gray’s lyrics spoke directly to me. Many of his songs are about the pain of feeling out of place in a heteronormative, conservative community.Â
As I came to terms with my own sexuality, his lyrics helped me to accept myself. In my favorite of his songs, “Jigsaw,” he writes, “I’ve changed every part of me/ until the puzzle pieces aren’t me at all / I look in the mirror, now I’m just a jigsaw.” Gray’s ability to enunciate the experience of queer youths, and the changes they have to undergo to be accepted by the dominant culture is astounding. His understanding that they are often forced to change or hide parts of themselves is evident. His music will always have a special place in my soul, as it got me through some of my darkest years.
While many artists discuss similar themes in their music, no one digs as deep as Gray. His pain comes across clearly while he manages to offer an underlying hopeful message to audiences. Not to mention his incredible style. No matter where he appears, Gray’s hair is always curly and shining, while his red-carpet and concert looks could outshine any ’80s rock star.Â
Gray’s journey to the spotlight started on YouTube. Many fans lovingly look back at his earliest videos, before pursuing music, where he showed off his impressive artwork. His extensive online presence throughout his life is emblematic of the shifting nature of celebrityhood. These days, more and more stars have records of their lives from before they obtained fame. Â
While by now Gray is hopefully a household name, he has not yet received the level of fame and recognition that his masterful artistry deserves. After the extensive fame his song “Heather” received and the recent success of his album “Wishbone,” far more people should be recognizing the generational talent that he is.
Despite releasing five studio albums since 2018, a much more rapid release pace than many prominent artists, he has never been nominated for a VMA or Grammy award. He was even asked to perform at the VMAs this year, despite being snubbed, alongside his music video partner, Corey Fogelmanis of Disney Channel’s “Girl Meets World.” They rendered a touching performance, presenting a queer twist to the story of “Romeo and Juliet” while Gray belted his new song “Vodka Cranberry.”
So I must beg the question: why hasn’t Conan Gray reached wide notoriety or received awards?Â
Regardless of increased acceptance, our culture still has a long way to go in being equally accepting and appreciative of queer art. Too often, the idea that queer art is only for LGBTQ+ individuals persists, while art made by straight artists must be universally relatable. The queer community is expected to keep their stars to themselves while the rest of the world fails to recognize their true talent.Â
I would firmly argue that Gray’s lyrics are far more widely relatable to the human experience than the ramblings of recently popularized singer-songwriter Benson Boone, whose lyrics sound to me like the ramblings of an AI bot. Additionally, Boone has been accused of “queer baiting.” The term refers to those who intentionally utilize historically queer styles and homo-erotic subtext to gain attention from LGBTQ+ audiences, despite being straight. Both Gray and Boone present seemingly queer aesthetics, while the one whose expression is not genuine garners far more attention.Â
Overall, our society needs to better recognize the accomplishments of queer artists. Straight individuals need to make a better effort to explore and appreciate musical expression that falls outside of their lived experience. LGBTQ+ people have had to for generations.