Cleaning out your closet at this time of year is normal. Not only are you sorting through your clothing, but sometimes the clutter from the past season makes you antsy to clean. As you pull out your warm-weather clothing and tuck away your sweaters, you find items that are no longer in style, or that you didn’t wear much during winter, or even that you no longer see yourself wearing. As time goes on, our own personal senses of style change along with the hot fashions each year.
But this year, I was faced with a different problem. I wasn’t sorting through clothes because they were old, out of style or just an item I didn’t reach for anymore. Rather, I was pulling out items that no longer fit me.
As I started to put on items that I had worn last spring, summer or even fall, I was faced with the reality that a handful of these items did not fit right. They didn’t button, or were bunchy in weird spots. Overall, these clothes were no longer flattering.
I would stand in front of my mirror every morning, devastated by the fact that the item no longer fit my body. I couldn’t fathom the idea that my body had changed, and so I would put the outfit back in my closet. Then, I’d pull it out a week later, leading to this cycle of depression and hate for the changes occurring in my body.
So, I cleaned out my closet. I pulled out the things that didn’t fit me or were no longer something I loved to wear. I put them in a bag, drove to the Goodwill, and said goodbye to them.
It is as simple as this: your body is not made to fit your clothing. Your clothing is made to fit your body.
Your worth does not come from the number on the tag inside your jeans. I was tired of waking up every morning saddened by the tightness of my shirt and thinking that not being able to fit in that shirt meant I was less of a person. That somehow the extra weight around my waist made me unlovable or unworthy. That was simply not the case.
So, I took it a step further.
I made a few changes.
Firstly, I went shopping. I didn’t obsess about the size or feel sad about the fact that certain outfits were simply not made for my figure. I bought items that made me excited to style them. I went with the intention of being able to pull out anything from my closet and be happy with the fact that it fit.
Next, I changed who I followed on social media. I looked for women that looked more like me. I did this for fashion advice for what I should be wearing, but to also be able to open my social media and be flooded with influencers that look very similar to me.
Lastly, I decided that I would wake up every day and remind myself of one thing: THAT BODIES CHANGE.
There is this horrible stigma in our society that changes in our body are either good or bad, when in reality it is just a fact of life. Throughout my life, my body is going to gain and lose weight. I will get new stretch marks, and may one day have loose skin from having a child.
No matter the reason for the change, it is natural for it to occur. I wake up every day and remind myself of that.
Does this mean that I don’t struggle with the change that my body has gone through in the last year? No, of course not.
But I have decided to take action every single day, to be one step closer to loving my body and meeting it where it is at.