Making friends in college can be so exciting! You are surrounded by new people and have the opportunity to meet people with similar interests as you. Maintaining those friendships, however, is a different story. College life is incredibly hectic. Students must balance their academics, work, family, relationships, and mental and physical health. Making time for friends can seem practically impossible. Nonetheless, it’s important to spend time with those who make you the happiest. I’ve definitely struggled with finding time for my friendships and life in general, but I have a few tips to help you find this balance.
- Communicate!
So many friendships end due to a lack of communication. Don’t make that same mistake! Be honest with your friends if you are not in the right state to be a good friend or need space. A true friend will be empathetic regardless of what you’re going through. Your friends can’t read your mind, so don’t expect them to understand what’s going on if you don’t tell them anything. If something with a certain friend is bothering you, communicate with them so you can work through the issue. They may not think anything is wrong, so it’s crucial to express any concerns you may have with the friendship so you can resolve it. Communication is important. Let your friends know where you’re at so that they can be there for you!
- Put time aside for them
When it comes to friends, making sure that you have time in your schedule to spend with them is essential! Getting to go out to eat, catch up, and hang out with the people you care about will help maintain those relationships. It’s also a lot of fun to experience new activities or places with your favorite people! Making memories and spending time together will help strengthen the bond your friendship most likely already has! Life can get super hectic as a college student, but spending time with friends doesn’t always have to be an extravagant event. You can spend time with friends by going grocery shopping together or doing homework. Hanging out with friends can be productive too!
- Be understanding
It’s so important to be understanding of everyone and their availability. Everyone is busy with college-level responsibilities, so it’s not as easy to make plans as it was before. As hard as it is, don’t take it personally if someone can’t hang out! They’re most likely genuinely busy and will want to reschedule with you when possible. Being understanding is important when it comes to their feelings and personal life experiences. They may feel differently than you about certain situations, and that’s completely valid. Compromise is always possible, and if it’s a true friend, they’ll be willing to work on that with you!
- Be fully present
When you do spend time to be with friends, make sure to be fully present with them! Take the time to listen to them and show how much you care! It’s important to make the most out of hangouts, especially with the friends you don’t get to see as often. Don’t be on your phone or preoccupied with other things. Enjoy the company you have right in front of you. It’s hurtful if a friend tries to tell you about their life while you aren’t giving them your full attention.
- Take advantage of virtual communication!
It’s so easy to communicate now that we have the internet, and we should be taking full advantage! Even if it’s once a week or once a month, keeping in touch is so important! Thank goodness we have facetime and text, and we can communicate even if friends are at different schools, traveling, etc. Especially if you haven’t gotten to hang out for a while, your friend will appreciate the effort. Tell your friends when you’re thinking of them, and it’ll make their day!
- Make an effort to reach out
If you notice a friend hasn’t replied to you in a while, check on them! They could be going through a difficult time and might not be in the right mindset to reach out first. Even if it’s just a 5-minute phone call or a text asking how they’re doing, the fact that you reached out will mean a lot to them. As their friend, you should be there for them through bad and good times. It’s better to reach out rather than make assumptions about why someone may not be answering or why you haven’t hung out in a while.
- Don’t let one silly misunderstanding end your friendship!
Unfortunately, many friendships end because of misunderstandings and not communicating effectively. It’s important to work through your problems rather than giving up and deciding not to be friends anymore. The most valuable friendships take a lot of work, and working through conflict will help strengthen your bond! You’re bound to argue with friends every now and then, especially if you’ve known each other for a long time. I’ve had disagreements with friends over the years, and we’re still as close as ever, so an argument doesn’t have to be a dealbreaker! Obviously, there are scenarios that are not forgivable or your friendship is not beneficial for anyone anymore, and that’s okay! People grow apart and not every friendship is meant to last forever. Although, the best ones will require the most effort. Work through the conflicts, and you’ll thank yourself in the future when you’re still friends!
Getting swept up by life and all its contents is bound to happen to all of us at one point or another, but it’s crucial to remember the importance of the relationships we have. Spending time with loved ones will help relieve the stress that comes with all of our responsibilities, and nurturing these special friendships will bring you happiness. Communicating effectively and reaching out at least every once in a while will help maintain those connections you make in college. Although you’re most likely not going to remain friends with everyone you meet in college, put effort into the friendships that mean the most to you. Friends come and go, but the most special ones will be in your life forever! I hope that these tips help make it easier for you to maintain college friendships despite how hectic life can get!